The night was calm, quiet. Aeris always liked the quiet nights. Nights like this were great for laying on the grass and letting her thoughts wander. A bitter-sweet memory of those nights that would never come again. 

She sighed and looked up at the starry sky as her thoughts wandered back to those days. Without a cloud in sight, she had a full view of the dark, studded canvas. The distant lights glimmered the way her celeste scales did when the sun struck them at just the right angle. It reminded her of the praise and adulation of the humans at all of those dinner parties. Her stomach knotted and churned. Those days when she was naïve and foolish. Those days when she was happy with her life because she didn’t know any better.

Pushing the reminiscent thoughts away, she looked around at the remaining snow on the rooftops. The last remnants of the winter season as spring came around, stubbornly sticking around as the weather turned warm. Just like she did. Soon the last of the snow and ice would melt and it would be as if it never existed. Not a single mark on the world as the grass grew again and the trees bloomed. 

As she looked at her surroundings, her gaze was eventually drawn to the pink scars dotting the left side of her body and immediately her stomach tightened to the point of nausea. It was a shame the scars wouldn’t disappear as the snow did, vanishing without a trace save for the memory she also hoped to forget. 

Aeris beat her wings, flying higher into the air. The view expanded to the distant trees and the lands beyond Strendor, though it was quickly lost to the inky darkness of the night. Still, she flew higher and higher until even the buildings below resembled little toys and Soon they, too, vanished from her vision. Small lights could be seen in the distance. A few million more and it would almost resemble the night sky. Once, such a view would have fascinated her. But now she felt nothing looking at the breathtaking scenery.

The sun would be rising soon, but she didn’t plan to watch. That was not the purpose of this final flight. The thought of what was to come next made her heart race. It was such a simple thing. It was so easy. It should be easy. But the thought frightened her. She had many crash landings while learning to fly and even a few afterward. Those weren’t fun moments and they were never done on purpose.

She slowed her wing beats to a stop. The wind rushed into her ears as she plummeted, the sense of vertigo taking hold. She closed her eyes and tried to ignore the ever-tightening knot causing a sharp ache in her gut.

Every part of her screamed to flap her wings again, but she ignored the cries of her body.

Thoughts of that day came flooding back. The pain, the fear, the desperation, the blood. She saw them—her three hatchlings. Their similar pale sky blue scales glowed like little empyreal lanterns in the darkness, but she couldn’t see their faces. The distance between them grew larger as the howling increased. She tried to call out to them, but her voice died in her throat. The wind rushed around her muzzle, choking her. It held her limbs down, preventing her from going after them. They continued to move away, the glow of their bodies growing dimmer as the darkness threatened to swallow them.

Panic gripped her. She willed her body to break the shackles holding it down and move, but the chains refused to break. The hatchlings were swallowed by the darkness, leaving her alone. 

The wind increased to a roar, making her wince in pain. It squeezed her body to the point she groaned and struggled. The air infiltrated her body, tightening around her organs, stealing her breath, and even blocking her thoughts.

She snatched her eyes open and saw the rooftop rushing up to meet her. She furiously flapped her wings to slow her descent. It felt as if the wind was pushing her down as it pulled. She sped up instead of slowing. 

She could only watch in horror as the rooftop rushed up to greet her, the pattern on the roof resembling a sadistic grin.

****

Aeris jolted awake, her breath coming in short hard bursts as she struggled against the invisible bonds that held her.

A hand gently fell on her chest, and a soothing voice said, “Aeris, what’s wrong?” 

Aeris slowly relaxed and looked down at the young woman. The fireplace had long since burned out, but enough light poured through the window from the moon that she could see.

Janine’s pale skin appeared ghost-like in the pallid light, making her freckles stand out even more. Her long black hair blocked most of her face, but her brown eyes still shone through, looking at Aeris worriedly.

“I’m…I’m fine,” Aeris said. “It was just a bad dream.”

“Ya sure?”

Aeris nodded and laid her head down again. Janine curled up under the blanket and lay her head on Aeris’s shoulder, giving a small sigh of contentment. Aeris lay awake in the dark until the harsh sound of Janine’s snoring filled the room. It was a sound she had come very accustomed to in the short time she had known the young woman.

The nightmare lingered in Aeris’s mind. She was too afraid to close her eyes and relive the horror. With nothing better to do, she took in her surroundings. 

The inside felt cold despite the warmth outside. The room lacked furnishings despite the single large mattress she and Janine lay on. The floor was so dusty, there were tracks marking their path from the mattress to the door and back again and the walls were stripped bare. 

It almost made her miss the estate and her room with its many furnishings, her shelf full of books, and wardrobe where she had so many vests, cloaks, and harnesses.

Thinking of the past made her growl. Janine shifted and Aeris quieted down. The young woman had given up so much for her, the least she could was let her sleep. So Aeris lay there quietly in the swirling torment of her thoughts about the past and what her future could possibly bring.

She began licking her claws. It wasn’t clear when the habit started, but after she awoke from sleep, she felt the need to clean her paws. They tasted of fresh blood even when she saw nothing on them. No matter how many times she washed, even when she licked them until her jaw was sore, the taste remained. But still, she did so anyway.

 
Janine awoke the moment the sun’s rays peered through the window. Aeris was grateful for the chance at some alone time. It wasn’t that she was ungrateful for everything Janine had done—she wouldn’t even be alive if it weren’t for her. But that reminder only drove the guilt deeper into her heart.

Aeris had been ready to accept her fate; she made peace with death and the life she was leaving behind. Only now she realized that Janine’s sacrifice would’ve been in vain had she died that day. The young woman who stood by her when there was no one else. She would’ve been left alone and stranded.

She lay there until the thoughts became too much to bear. She grabbed her cloak on the floor and slipped it on. Immediately, she felt calmer and less exposed with the dark fabric covering her body, hiding the marks of her shame. 

It wouldn’t be long before the others woke up, if they hadn’t already, so hurried down the hall at a half-trot. She had no idea where to go after leaving, but she wanted to be out the door before the others showed up.

She had just made it into the common room when a feminine voice called behind her, “And where do you think you’re going?”

Aeris stopped and spun around coming face-to-face with Sasha. The woman leaning forward in a nearby armchair, brow raised and giving her a strong disapproving look.

Aeris couldn’t meet her gaze so stared at the woman's chest. It was the same scolding look Maggie gave her. Thinking about the woman who raised her made her stomach tighten. “I…I was—I mean, um—”

Sasha brushed her brown hair out of her face and motioned for Aeris to move closer. Arguing was pointless, so Aeris took her place in front of the chair. Sasha’s bag was already sitting on the floor next to the chair. She pulled out a stethoscope and a bottle of ointment.

Aeris sat patiently as the cloak was removed and Sasha palpated Aeris’s face and neck.

“So, anything I need to know about?” Sasha asked.

“No.”

She placed the stethoscope against Aeris’s chest then her right side. “Deep breath for me. Any tightness? Pain? Difficulty breathing?”

“No more than usual. It still feels funny to lay on that side.”

“That’s normal. It’ll pass soon enough.”

Aeris fought the urge to frown. There was nothing normal about her situation. Sasha moved on to inspecting Aeris’s claws and wings. Aeris stiffened, worried the woman would find traces of blood.

“Have you been stretching like I told you?”

“Yes.”

“Good. We don’t want you to get stiff. You were already bed-ridden for several weeks. Have you tried to fly yet?”

Aeris shook her head.

“I’ll have to talk to Maxis about that later. Hopefully he’ll say yes. I don’t want you getting out of shape on me.”

The part Aeris dreaded most came. Sasha gently turned her to the side and inspected her scars. Just feeling the woman’s fingers touch the bullet marks made her shiver. It was hard not to think about what happened. Sasha placed some ointment on her fingers then rubbed it on the scars.

“Sadly, I don’t think these scars are ever going away, but they’re healing nicely.”

Aeris said nothing.

Sasha wiped her hands on a cloth then returned the ointment and stethoscope to her bag. She then put Aeris’s cloak back on. “Well, that’ll do it. You know, you’re pretty lucky. I thought that if the blood loss didn’t kill you, an infection would.” She smiled warmly. “But now look at you. Back on the road to recovery.”

Again, Aeris was silent.

The savory smell of breakfast filled her nose. Despite the pleasantness of cooked meat and herbs, she felt nauseous.

“Something smells good,” Sasha said. “What do you say we go eat?”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Too bad. As your doctor, I can’t let you skip a meal.”

Aeris sighed and followed Sasha to the kitchen. Janine was hard at work, making breakfast for everyone. Aeris quickly found the corner furthest from every and anything Janine was using and sat down.

“Need any help?” Sasha asked, already grabbing an apron from a nearby hook and rolling up her sleeves.

“Oh, thanks,” Janine said. “I been elbow deep in this since I started. Aeris would you like to help?”

“No, no thanks.” She turned away from the kitchen and returned to the common room, seizing her chance to leave the building uncontested. She kept her head down to avoid looking at the guns and knives on the wall.

The plans for spending some time alone were dashed as Maxis stood in the common room. The drake rarely spoke or acknowledged her and yet she felt the most intimidated by his presence. He seemed occupied with something on the table, but his large form blocked any view of it. Whatever the large nightstalker was doing, she had no intention of disturbing him.

She moved quietly as possible towards the front door.

“You aren’t going alone,” Maxis said, his growling timbre sending a chill down her spine.

Heavy footfalls echoed in the hall before Terran appeared in the doorway. “Who’s leaving now?”

“The dragon we saved is trying to get herself killed,” Maxis said, still staring at the table.

Terran turned to Aeris. “C’mon, Aeris, we told you. Whoever tried to kill you might not be happy to learn you’re still alive. You can’t go outside alone.” He crossed the room and grabbed his coat. “I gotta take care of some things anyway, so you can come with me.”

She nodded and acquiesced as her claws scraped the floor.

Strendor was a much busier city than Rubelum. Even without going to the commercial district, the streets always seemed packed with humans and dragons going about their day.  Being outside didn’t feel much better than inside, but there were more distractions. Spring had come and most of the snow had melted, but there was still the occasional pile here or there that hadn’t quite vanished yet. No one took notice of her or the large man by her side. For once she wasn’t the center of attention for that she was grateful. Grateful for the silence, the loneliness, the peace.

Terran said nothing as he went from place to place, buying things and talking to various humans. When on the street, he kept his hands tucked deep into his pockets and watching everything around them. Aeris mostly kept her head down, only looking up occasionally to prevent walking into someone.

Terran broke the silence. “So, I hear you haven’t been sleeping well.”

“I...I sleep fine.”

“You’re a terrible liar.”

I’m better at it than you think, she thought. “I was shot and almost died. How am I supposed to sleep?”

“Not good, I guess.” There was a long silence before he spoke again. “I’ve been shot before. It hurts like a bitch.”

“Okay.”

“So, I’ve been meaning to ask you something. What are you plans now that you’re feeling better?”

Aeris lifted her head. “I…hadn’t thought about it. I don’t have a home to go back to, and there’s nowhere for me to go.”

“Well, why not stay here?”

“Why do you care?”

“Because after all we went through to save you, I would hate for something to happen to you. Plus Sasha would skin me alive if something did.”

She said nothing. It made sense for Janine and Sasha to fret over her well-being, but Terran had no reason to care. He often stared at her, usually like something he had never seen before. It was a look she had gotten used to as many humans who saw her for the first time often stared. But the way he fussed over her well-being and even refused to accept any payment for saving them that made her uneasy. She had overheard Maxis complaining to the human that they had overstayed their welcome and had no reason to remain in Strendor. Terran always made up a flimsy excuse or said nothing.

She wondered about the reason behind Terran’s kindness. If he secretly wanted to use her as her former master once did. As a dragon, she had very little rights in the human lands, and someone like her would fetch a good price.

“So what do you think?” Terran asked.

Aeris jerked out of her thoughts. “What?”

“You weren’t listening were you?” He laughed when she tucked her head. “I should’ve known something was up when you didn’t answer. I was saying that I want you and Janine to come with Maxis and me when we head north.”

“Why?”

“There’s usually more work up there and with the snow melting—”

“No, I mean why are you asking me? Sasha says I’m going to be just fine. You saved my life.  There’s no reason to care about us anymore.”

Terran stopped walking. “I thought I had earned some trust from you by now. Besides, both of you wouldn’t survive out here on your own.”

She wasn’t sure what to say. Part of her still didn’t want to trust Terran, but another part knew he was right. She had been brought up sheltered. Surviving in the world was completely foreign.

He chuckled and moved to pat her head or grab her by the horn--she couldn't tell which. Either way, she quickly backed out of reach. He froze with a hand outstretched, wearing a look of concern. He then gave her an uneasy smile and said, “You don’t need to answer right away. Just think on it. Now we should be heading back.”

The walk back was long, quiet, and awkward. Terran fidgeted a lot and mumbled to himself. Whatever was on his mind, she was glad he didn't say it. She already had a lot to think about.

She couldn't stay in Strendor. This place was a reminder of what happened, a massive grave she couldn't claw out of. But it left a bad taste in her mouth to have to rely on another human. Then there was her former master. He left her alone for now, but that could change if he learned she was still alive. 

Janine could be trusted, but no one else.

The moment they crossed the threshold, Sasha’s rage-filled voice filled the inn. “TERRAN! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!”

Terran froze as Sasha stormed into the common room. She didn't stand higher than his chest, but he cowered as she poked him threateningly. 

“You took my patient outside?! I haven’t cleared her for that yet! What were you thinking?”

“She’s healed enough that she can move about on her own,” Terran said. “Besides, I was right there with her the whole time.”

Sasha turned to Aeris, and her anger vanished. “Snowflake, would you kindly go to your room? I need to have a talk”—she shot a venomous glare at Terran—“with your protector.”

She was going to her room regardless, so she left without hesitation. But the distance didn’t stop her from hearing them.

“She hadn’t even eaten anything yet and you’re already taking her out for walks?”

“That’s what this is about? Because she missed breakfast?”

“It’s about more than that! I’ve been trying to get her to eat for days! She hardly touches anything you put in front of her, and she needs it if she’s going to recover!”

“She looks pretty good to me.”

“Read between the lines, dammit! Janine told me Snowflake has been having nightmares. I’ve been examining her every day for the last few weeks. She’s getting thinner.”

“What am I supposed to do about it?”

“How about you try—”

Aeris closed the door with her tail. Their muffled voices still carried, but she couldn’t make out the words. She sighed and headed for the mattress.

No sooner had she laid down did the door open again and Janine poked her head inside.

“Hey, was thinkin you might be in the mood for something to eat.” She opened the door wider and stepped inside, revealing the large bowl she carried. Already, the smell of porridge filled the room. “Maxis ate the steaks I was makin; this is all that’s left.”

“No, thanks,” Aeris said.

Janine carried the bowl to her anyway and sat it on the floor. She then sat on the mattress.

“Have you thought about what I said?” Aeris asked.

“How many times do I have to say it? I ain’t going back to Rubelum.”

“But—”

“No, buts! I said I was stayin by your side and I meant it.” She pushed the bowl closer to Aeris. “Now what we should be doing is figuring out how we’re going to get your eggs back.”

Aeris stiffened. 

“I’m still trying to get Terran to agree to help us. But that man is more stubborn than pa. We gotta move fast now that you're walkin again. If we move fast, we might be able to—Aeris, what’s wrong?”

“What? Nothing…nothing is wrong.” 

Aeris turned away when Janine gently touched her.

“Hey, it’s okay if you don’t wanna talk about it. I’ll do all the talkin. You ain’t gotta do a thing.”

I have to tell her. She needs to know. “It’s not that.” She took a shuddering breath. “They…they’re…dead. I…I smashed them. It was the only way I could--” The rest of the words locked in her throat. She stared downward at her claws, covered in blood, as she left deep scars in the mattress.

Janine cradled Aeris’s head. “I’m so sorry,” she said, choking on tears. “I wanted to help you. I tried, but there were so many of them. If I had gotten to you sooner, I could’ve…”

Aeris wanted to tear herself away, but her strength failed her as she went limp in the young woman’s arms. The dam inside of her broke and a mournful whine spilled forth. She didn’t care that it echoed throughout the room. She didn’t care if the others could hear it or not. All she wanted to do was tear down the world around her to be free from the nightmare.

Janine continued to hold her, gently stroking her neck and trying to soothe her.