Winter 4986, 32 Aoimoth

“How much longer do you figure they'll keep her here?” Daunas asked Selibra before the Major General had even stepped up beside the Weaponmaster. He stood beside the sparring ring with his arms crossed, watching the oldest Squires spar with their hammers. He'd positioned himself carefully, so he stood between the fighting boys and the practicing Shon and Lily, blocking their view with his broad chest and stern glare.

Selibra sighed, looking over his shoulder at the girl in question. Snow fell as she spun a quarterstaff through the most basic form they taught the Squires, her golden hair plastered to her head and face as though she stood in rain. He sighed again, “I don’t know. They don’t want to take her to the Mages Guild until they finish their excavation of the tower. And…” Selibra turned back to his old friend, dropping his voice, “They think we can keep her out of trouble here. If she really is the one who burned the tower…”

“Then what will she do to a city?” Dauans finished the thought but shook his head, “They’re overreacting. She’s a good girl, curious, and a bit stubborn, but with overall good intentions.” 

The destroyed target had been replaced, but Selibra stared pointedly at where it had been anyway, until Daunas shrugged, “She’s a teenager! So she has a little bit of a temper, besides, she hit it dead on." He gestured with his chin towards some distracted Squires, "I’m more worried about the effect she’s having on the boys when she doesn’t lose her temper…” 

Selibra hummed, his mouth drawn in a tight line, “There’s a reason we train the boys and girls at separate facilities…” Daunas laughed out his barking laugh, and the Squires staggered a moment, exchanging looks and shrugs before going back to their matches. Selibra sighed, “Perhaps we should move up the schedule on the talk.”

“That’s all on you, old friend. You know my opinions on those rules. And the ‘instructions,’” Daunas formed quotations in the air, “are four to six years too late! But if it helps keep them from getting distracted, then maybe you can shame them into line.”

“It isn’t about shame…” but Dauans wasn’t listening, so Selibra said instead, “I’ll talk to Sir Tolkin about rescheduling today’s lesson… but I would like you with me to speak to the girl.”

Daunas smirked, “Want an assistant with some actual experience, do you? See? I told you having a rough and tumble enlisted like myself in your ranks would come in handy.”

Selibra huffed, “Bring her to my office after lunch, Weaponmaster.”

“Sir,” Daunas waved Selibra a lazy salute as the Major General left, shaking his head.

***

"Don't try to control it!" Lily called, "Close your eyes and just feel it as it is. It's an extension of yourself. Like your fingers are an extension of your hands."

"I can control my fingers, Lily," Shon snarled while those same fingers clenched the handle of his hammer significantly tighter than he intended in his frustration. Ice crackled beneath his feet as his weight shifted. He could feel the frost blanket continue to expand, growing out from the hammer’s head held only a few inches above frozen ground.

"And you can control this, after you learn how to feel it. I don't suppose you've ever tried to do something carefully with numb fingers, have you?" She actually had the gall to giggle, and Shon opened his eyes to glare at her.

Far from being intimidated, Lily rolled her eyes at him, "Oh, don't look at me like that. You can't expect to run or even walk if you can't feel your legs."

Shon gritted his teeth and wrenched the hammer free before it could be fully encased in the still growing ice. Holding it at the ready, he shot over to her, “How much longer before I can not freeze everything around me?”

From a safe distance away, Lily shrugged, continuing her staff form. She looked more like a dancer than a fighter, spinning through the dips and dodges of the kata as though putting on a show and not fighting off an opponent. “How long did it take you to learn how to walk?” she asked.

Shon growled; the ice grew. He didn’t have years to practice this magic, and didn’t want to use it anyway. He just wanted to stop endangering his companions long enough for Ivelm to finish his sealing item. Ryuuko whistled from its perch above the weapons, sending a wave of disapproval directly into Shon's mind. Shon ignored it.

Looking at Lily again, his frustration vanished like a moth in her flame. Lily spun in the falling snow, the tips of her staff glowing and leaving trailing circles of light in their wake. She wasn’t working through the kata anymore. Instead, she was going through some of the more complex, and showy, drills. Spinning her staff in a figure eight before her, then behind her, then letting it rotate over her wrist, then around her neck to her other hand.

To her, it was a game. One she was starting to get very good at after practicing almost non-stop for over a week. She ran with the Squires in the morning and practiced with the staff while they worked with their swords. After breakfast, she would forgo the sermon and continue practicing outside, often coming to the following lesson late.

It was only recently that she'd started merging her magic with the weapon, igniting the tips and setting the ground alight around her as she turned.

Master Daunas seemed too impressed to order her to stop, though every Paladin that saw felt obligated to remind her that, outside the fortress, she wouldn’t be allowed to use her powers without a clearance. Lily would roll her eyes, and Shon would worry. Though it was hard to imagine anyone trying to stop something so beautiful.

Lily threw her burning staff into the air, spun in a complete circle, then caught it swinging it down and to the side to hold under her arm behind her. She let out a long breath, the fire dying and leaving the wood unblemished.

Standing straight, Lily tried to comb soaked hair out of her face.

Tearing his eyes away from her, Shon removed his helmet and dusted unmelted snow from it, and then his hair, as the bell for lunch sounded.

Master Daunas called their dismissal, and though some of the boys went to drop off their hammers, many more stood in place, staring as Lily passed to drop off her staff. Snow didn’t stick to her like it did to Shon. It never even reached her. Her white tunic was soaked through and clung to her skin as if she'd been swimming. Shon could just make out the scarlet stripe of her scales twisting around her body through the shirt. Ryuuko flew down to land on his shoulder, expanding its wings and blocking Shon's view. Reminding him non-to-subtly that he was staring.

Lily dropped her staff on the rack and headed for the fortress, humming to herself, but as she passed Master Daunas, the Weaponmaster cleared his throat, “Miss Lily,” she stopped, tilting her head at him. The Squires shifted uncomfortably in their heavy armor, “You should probably change before lunch.”

“Why?”

Some of the Squires choked, and Shon hid his face in his hand. Baradin managed a step closer to her but was pointedly looking at her forehead, “You’re soaked, Lily.”

“So?” Lily asked. Shon spread his fingers to see her looking down at herself, twisting to look at her back, “It'll dry over lunch, and it’s going to get wet again in the afternoon anyway.” Ryuuko twittered a little dragon giggle at Lily's ignorance.

“Get a dry shirt, Lily.” Daunas ordered, walking away from her before turning to bark at the Squires, “Armor! Now!” The Squires all jumped, running in a clanking din to finish dropping off their weapons and rush upstairs before they could miss lunch.

Shon ran his fingers through his hair -snow flaking off of him as it would off cold dead stone- and made for the weapons rack. Lily looked down at herself again, frowning, and when Shon passed, she hopped to walk beside him, “It will just get wet again. Why waste another shirt?” He tried not to look at her, then he tried to only look at her eyes. Neither worked, and Shon cleared his throat, jerking his head forward and staring at the door as if it could save him from her naivete. He left her question unanswered, and Lily picked at her shirt, pulling it off her skin then letting it fall back down, looking confused, “Does Hengist not like when people are wet or something? Seems even more stupid than usual.” 

Shon cleared his throat, glancing at Ryuuko, then Lily with a pointed, unspoken message. The pseudodragon chirped, crawling from Shon's shoulder to Lily's and letting a wing drape down to cover her breasts. Lily didn't seem to notice and just stroked the dragon's scales, still tilting her head at Shon in question as she followed him up the stairs. She left the boys at the head of the stairs, going to her room to change as ordered.

Lily and Ryuuko beat most of the Squires to the mess and were eating in the middle with the others when Shon arrived. Rerves sat beside her, and as Shon continued on to his usual spot, Rerves asked her, “You’ve got the basics of the staff down now. Which weapon do you want to try next?”

Shon glanced their direction, for some reason on edge, until Lily shrugged, answering, “I’m not sure if I want to. The staff is really fun! And I haven’t even gotten to spar anyone yet.” she poked Rerves in the arm pointedly wiggling her eyebrows at him.

She'd been trying to get the others to spar her ever since Shon had moved her beyond stances and let her actually start working with the weapon itself. They'd all managed to come up with excuses not to, though Shon thought he had the only legitimate reason. He wasn’t allowed to spar with anyone until his power was under control.

Rerves made his excuses again, something about not being very good at the staff himself but maybe once he refreshed himself on the technique. Shon rolled his eyes but then Zihler passed Rerves and Lily, taking the spot across from Shon. Shon arched an eyebrow and Zihler looked from Lily to Shon then back to Lily before hissing, “Hey Shon…” Shon switched eyebrows, while Zihler looked nervously between Shon and Lily again, finally asking, “You aren’t going to spar her, are you?”

“I can’t spar,” Shon reminded Zihler bitterly.

“But when you can?”

Shon shrugged. Someone needed to. He didn’t understand why they were all so reluctant. Lily hadn’t intentionally or unintentionally burned anything since her display with the target, “You could just ask her not to use fire. She has enough control not to.” he tried to hide the bitterness in his voice but wasn’t sure if he succeeded.

“That’s not-” Zihler started,

Shon actually interrupted, “Didn't you want to teach her?” This was ridiculous. If she was going to learn to fight, then she needed to practice actually fighting.

“I… Look,” Zihler leaned forward to speak in an urgent whisper, “She’s a civilian. She she shouldn't fight at all. It’s our job to protect people like her…” Shon sat back from Zihler, confused. Zihler just sighed, picking up his sandwich, but then conceded, “Just… get Thom or Rerves to spar her if she insists.”

Narrowing his eyes, Shon started, “Once my ice is sealed-”

“It's not about your Sorcerer shit Shon. It’s-” the bell ending lunch broke him off, and Shon watched as Zihler tried to shove as much of his sandwich in his mouth as possible before his turn to stand.

If it wasn’t about his magic going out of control, like with Kefir, then what was it? Shon didn’t get a chance to press the issue as they marched silently toward the classroom.

Master Daunas waited outside the door, causing the lead Squire to hesitate. The Weaponmaster gestured the boys in but pulled Lily out of line as she started to pass, “This lesson isn’t for you, Miss.” Lily scowled up at him and even opened her mouth to argue when he held up a hand to interrupt her, “Major General Selibra wants a word. Let’s go.”

Ryuuko hopped delicately from her shoulder to Rehlien's, then crawled from his to Shon's. “Am I in trouble?” she asked, sounding more curious than concerned. Shon didn’t hear the answer before the door closed and he was forced to take his seat.

The Paladin instructor reviewed his notes at the front of the class and muttered, “No test today, boys, it’s been postponed to tomorrow.” Some of the boys sighed in relief. Others turned to friends for quiet high fives -kept low under the table- but others looked as confused as Shon felt. They'd never rescheduled lessons before.

The instructor turned his back on them and began writing on the board, in large neat handwriting.

S. Swailand province? Weren’t they supposed to start that only after their month of watch?

E. Segregation in Gasha? They covered that weeks ago, were the test results bad enough they needed to cover it again before taking the final exam?

X...

The instructor turned back to the boys to find a room of sixteen Squires staring in abject horror at the word. “Sex…” he started, then cleared his throat, somehow managing to draw out their torment with one droning word, “within the law of the Temple.

“You have already been educated on the laws surrounding sex and consent in the kingdom, but the Temple has rules for its Paladins that, though encouraged, are not required to be followed by ordinary citizens or enlisted…” A lecture on law. Shon breathed a sigh of relief. Though looking around at his fellows, he saw at least a few who continued to look mortified.

One such squire, Jawsh, rose a shaking hand. The instructor looked down at him and sniffed but instead of calling on him, said, “I know some of you have already received this lecture in private, but you will be required to test with the rest, and so you are to stay and receive it again.” Jawsh dropped his hand and looked at his close friend, Mika. The two shared a look of dismay, and Shon remembered the occasion when they'd been called aside for a private talk… shortly after they started making eyes at each other.

The instructor continued, “You should already be aware that as Squires, you are not permitted to court potential partners. Your focus should be on training and communion with Hengist. Your relationship with him is paramount during this time of your life. After you've taken your Oath, such restrictions will be lifted. However, sex before marriage is not permitted under any circumstances.

“Though sexual relations are a sacred and beautiful thing, they also carry with them a tremendous amount of responsibility. Should a bastard be produced, the child would be unable to inherit anything from you. Even after parentage is proven, the Temple will only take responsibility for the child's needs, the same cannot be done with their mother. For example, though the Temple may pay for your child to be transferred with you during a change of station, your lover will have to pay their own way. This is done to keep potential abusers from taking advantage of the Temple. If they really cared, they would seek official recognition with a bond of marriage. Even if a child were produced, there is no guarantee that the Temple will bless a marriage if the mother is suspected of having ulterior motives.

“Even in cases where a child is not -or cannot be- produced, sex between two people forms a bond between them. You give of yourself your body, as well as part of your spirit. As Paladins, your body and spirit belong first and foremost to Hengist.” the instructor took a moment to clear his throat again, surprisingly unbothered by the lack of notes being taken by his students. “Are there any questions?”

No one spoke, a few exchanged looks, and Shon’s stomach tied itself in knots. Lectures were two hours long, and barely fifteen minutes had passed. What else would they talk about? And why were the boys who'd already received this talk covering their faces?

The instructor looked at each nervous face then nodded, “Moving on. Sex and sexual urges are completely natural. As stated at the beginning of this lecture, sexual relations can be sacred and beautiful, once permitted, and a suitable partner found. Until then, our bodies continue to crave pleasure and connection with those we may find attractive. And though you cannot and should not form a connection sexually before marriage, you can and should satisfy your natural needs…” the instructor once again cleared his throat, closing his eyes as he finished, “Take the matter into your own hands, so to speak.”

Shon felt his jaw drop as the others around him did their best not to make eye contact with each other. Jawsh and Mika dropped their heads to the table, their faces as deep a red as Lily’s scales. This, this was why she wasn’t allowed into this lecture. If it had just been law, they probably would've encouraged her. But this?

“Masturbation is a technique to be utilized when you feel the urge to mate interfering with your daily tasks…” Gods no, “The most common method is to find a private place and time and use your hand, or hands…” please no, “You may find it easiest to imagine the ideal partner…” anything but this. The instructor continued in the same monotone he always used in lecture, going through the mechanics of self-pleasure and clean-up while the Squires either hid their faces or stared straight ahead so as not to risk looking at each other. The youngest of them was fourteen, the oldest eighteen, every one of them looked as if they wanted to melt into the floor.

“You are young, and so the urge to have sex will be strong. However, you are encouraged to keep your mind on your studies, so feel free to 'clear your mind' as often as necessary. Your actions are your responsibility alone, and a lack of discipline on your part is no one's fault but your own. But that's not to say you should avoid, if necessary, informing anyone who is presenting any inappropriate temptations to adjust their behavior…” an image of Lily looking down at her wet shirt, stuck tight and nearly translucent to her chest, blossomed unbidden in Shon’s mind and he dropped his head to the table with a muffled groan.

Ryuuko tried to force its head between him and the table, chirping indignantly and hissing in frustration when Shon refused to move. The memory answered his unspoken questions. Why this talk? Why now when they were supposed to be taking a test on cultural etiquette? But how did one explain to someone like Lily the effect she had on the Squires? 

*** 

Lily took her seat across from the Major General’s desk. Selibra himself sat with his fingers laced together in front of his mouth while Daunas and the Cleric stood behind him to either side. “Am I in trouble?” Lily asked again. She found it hard to believe that such grim faces portended anything but doom, no matter what Daunas said.

The Cleric managed a smile, “No, Miss, we…”

“Lily.” Lily interrupted him, “My name is Lily.”

Selibra sighed, “You are not in trouble, Miss Lily.” he dropped his hands but still looked unusually solemn. Lily tilted her head in question, and he sighed again, “What do you know about sex?” he finally asked.

“Reproductive or recreational?” Lily asked. The Cleric seemed to have something suddenly stuck in his throat, and for some reason, Daunas hid his mouth with his hand, his eyes twinkling.

“Let us start with reproductive…” Selibra led.

Lily rolled her eyes, “Man pole goes into the lady hole, you stir it around a bit and then bam,” she clapped her hands together, and Selibra and the Cleric jumped, “a few months later, baby.”

Selibra cleared his throat and managed to nod, “Well… that isn’t…inaccurate…” he shifted in his seat, “What about... recreational?”

Lily shrugged, “Well, it’s supposed to be really fun.” Daunas was trying to smother a laugh and failing, “And it doesn’t even have to include a pole or hole, though it usually does. The important part is that everyone has fun and feels good.” she shrugged again.

Selibra and the Cleric just stared while Daunas snickered, saying, “That isn’t exactly inaccurate either, Selibra…” the Major General shot a glare at the Weaponmaster, who just continued to smother his laugh.

“What do you know about… about consent?” the Cleric asked, looking more nervous than embarrassed for some reason.

“You mean permission? Well, I would assume that if it's for fun, everyone involved would want to play.” she leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms and legs, bouncing her foot in the air as she thought, “Ran said that recreational sex is a lot like dessert. You need reproductive sex to make babies, that’s like normal food when you’re hungry, but sex for fun is like dessert; you don’t need it, but it's nice. But even if someone really likes dessert, no one wants it shoved down their throat.” she shrugged, switching her crossed legs and bouncing her other foot, “It's rather rude to force someone to eat when they don’t want to.”

“It’s illegal,” Selibra said, leaning over his desk.

“Well yeah, they might choke.”

Selibra blinked at her for nearly a full minute. Finally, the Cleric cleared his throat, “We mean with sex, Miss Lily, it is illegal to force someone to have sex without their consent.”

“Oh! Well, I would hope so. It's supposed to be fun, right? It's never fun to be forced to do something you don’t want to do.” this was turning out to be a very strange conversation. Lily looked between the three men. Selibra was rubbing his temples while the Cleric and Daunas looked at each other without speaking.

Selibra sighed, “Well… at least that's clear… now that we know you understand at least the basics, I want to talk to you about your behavior with the Squires.”

Lily covered her mouth and giggled into her hands. Selibra and the Cleric both looked horrified, and that just made Lily laugh louder, “You think the Squires and I are going to have sex?” she asked, still laughing, “They can’t even touch me! And there are places a lot hotter than my hands…” she wiped a tear of laughter from her eye, regaining some composure, but still feeling giggly, “Besides, none of them has said anything about sex at all, let alone with me.”

“It’s… it’s not exactly something most people are comfortable talking about, Miss Lily.” the Cleric blurted.

“Why not?” Lily asked.

Selibra gaped like a landed fish but didn’t answer her question. Lily turned her eyes to the Cleric, but the man had turned bright red and had his jaw clenched so tight she wasn't sure he was ever going to be able to open it again. Finally, she looked to Daunas, who laughed his booming bark of a laugh.

The Weaponmaster placed a hand on the Major General’s shoulder, “I don’t think tact is going to work with this one, Selibra,” he gave the Paladin a little shake then addressed Lily, “The Squires aren’t allowed to have sex. Even for fun,” he said, continuing quickly when Lily opened her mouth to ask why “and they won’t be able to as Paladins either until they get married, and then only with their spouse. But that doesn’t mean they won’t be tempted, and having someone attractive around is very tempting.”

“Someone...?” Lily started, then realized her mistake and slapped her head with her hand, “You mean people only want to have sex with attractive people? Well, a lot of the Squires are handsome." She tapped her lip in thought, concluding, "I think it's the muscles." She grinned, continuing with a shrug, "But they should be used to each other by now. Though,“ she leaned forward in her chair and whispered, “Jawsh and Mika DO like each other, but I don’t think they've had sex, so try not to worry.”

The Cleric coughed, “We… we have already spoken to Squires Jawsh and Mika, and they are prepared to postpone any serious relationship until after they swear their Oaths… We are talking about you, Lily, and the effect you have on the boys who are attracted to females.”

Lily tilted her head and looked down at her body, then back up at the men, “Well, I am female. But I thought you said temptation came from someone attractive? None of them have said anything about sex OR me being attractive.”

Selibra choked for real, letting slip a quiet “huh?”

Daunas narrowed his eyes at her, serious for the first time, “You are a lovely girl, Lily, but young men like our Squires are not just going to come out and tell you that.”

“Well, that’s just silly.” Lily rolled her eyes.

Selibra finally managed to find his words, “Silly or not, some of the Squires find you sexually attractive, and we would appreciate it if you didn’t make it harder on them than necessary while you’re here.”

Lily only fully registered his first few words and took a moment to furrow her brow at his desk as she thought. Some of the boys found her to be sexually attractive? But why? And why hadn’t any of them told her? The Cleric was speaking again, and Lily wrenched her attention away from her own thoughts to listen, “... things like showing more skin than is necessary or excess touch-”

“I can’t touch them,” Lily interrupted. And what did her skin have to do with anything?

“Just try to avoid things like today, Lily,” Daunas said, shaking his head, “Wet clothes stick to the body and show more than most young men can handle.”

“Why?” Lily asked, and when no one answered right away, she sighed, dropping her hands in her lap theatrically, “You’re not making any sense. We all have skin. Is it tempting when they look in the mirror too? Don't they shower together?”

The men all exchanged confused glances, and Daunas finally shrugged, looking down at the Major General, who seemed to be looking to the Weaponmaster for help, “I think this is the best you're going to get Selibra. She obviously isn’t doing anything on purpose. You’ll just have to trust the boys.”

“Still…” Selibra cleared his throat and addressed Lily, “I would like you to keep in mind the things Cleric Sahnar has said and do your best to remain modest and keep from tempting the Squires as much as possible.”

Lily could only shrug but nodded, not sure exactly what they would've expected her to do if they hadn’t given her this talk. She was allowed to go but was forbidden from joining the Squires in their lesson today, “I’ll just ask about it when it's over.” she tried to explain. But, the officers held firm, so she went outside instead.

It had stopped snowing, though the sky remained dark with thick clouds threatening further falling ice. Lily retrieved her staff and took a moment to shake it at the sky, “Don’t you dare make me change again! I only have three shirts!” and she didn’t want to wear a dress again. She'd only ever worn dresses before, and now that she had the option of pants, she never wanted to go back to such garments again.

She sighed, looking around the empty courtyard. Paladins patrolled the walls and stood at the gates, but up there, they were more like fixtures than people. Only the ever-present tink tink of Nangran’s hammer from his smithy kept her from feeling completely alone.

Lily started her kata, skipping stretches for now. It still felt strange to be allowed outside whenever she wanted. As she turned in her form, she half expected to see Brom standing behind her, a confused smile turning up the corners of his mouth as he asked, ‘what are you doing, Goldy?’ Lily dropped her staff.

She shook her head, banishing the image and thoughts trying to push their way into her mind. Brom wasn’t there. She wasn’t at the tower anymore. Her neck itched.

Paladins started yelling, and Lily spun, dropping her staff again and holding her hands up to her neck. An old man in long violet robes strode past the gate Paladins, snapping his fingers at them and making Lily flinch, “I’m here for Flintchest, FLINTCHEST!” he yelled, and the tinking of the Smith's hammer stopped. A moment later, the sturdy man himself appeared in the smithy doorway, wiping his massive hands on a dirty apron.

The Mage strode forward, the guards no longer trying to stop him. Lily stumbled back, but the movement caught his attention. He stopped and looked her up and down with exaggerated motions, then spat on the ground. “And what exactly are you?” Lily was momentarily pulled away from the strange panic that had gripped her, and she tilted her head at him. He sniffed and spat again. What am I?

“You got it, Elm?” Nangran drew the Mage’s attention and waved a Paladin down, speaking quietly to the knight, who then nodded and moved towards the fortress.

“Of course I have it!” the Mage spun on his heel, his robes billowing around him as he planted his fists on his hips, “Even after you bullied me into this foolishness, you doubt me!” the Mage stormed off, still grumbling something about debts and favors and disappeared into the smithy with Nangran.

Lily was alone again and now more curious than frightened. Why had she even been frightened to begin with? It was silly. She shook her head and looked from her staff to the fortress to the sky, then to the smithy. How much longer before the Squires would be done with their mysterious lesson? It had only been half an hour, and she was already tired of being alone. When she was alone, she thought, and she didn’t want to think. ‘It doesn’t concern you, Red.’ Ran’s voice floated down like snow.

Lily scrambled to retrieve her staff from the ground and started her kata. She was holding the stick too tight. Shon would rap her knuckles if he were there. How much longer before they came down to practice daggers? She cursed Selibra and Daunas for forcing her to be alone in the middle of the day.

The Paladin who'd gone to the fortress reappeared, and behind him…

“Shon!” Lily shouted, stopping her kata mid-step and sprinting to join him, “You were let out early? What did you guys learn today? Why couldn’t I come? I want to study with you guys…” Shon blinked at her flurry of questions, and Lily took a deep breath, speaking more slowly, “Sorry. Where are you going? Can I come?” Ryuuko whistled at her then chittered in Shon's ear.

Shon sighed but smiled one of his small, subtle smiles that she couldn’t ever help but return with a beaming one of her own. He nodded to her last question then started towards the smithy. Lily fell into step with him.

“You aren’t in trouble then?” he asked. Ryuuko slithered its way down Shon's arm, then up Lily's to take its place on Lily's shoulder.

“I don’t think so…” Lily furrowed her brow, then asked, “Do you think I’m sexually attractive?” Shon tripped through the opening to the smithy.

“About time!” the Mage called, interrupting Shon’s stutter. “Your sealing item, good knight,” his voice dripped with sarcasm, “Now you can join the rest of the mindless brutes without fear of expanding your horizons beyond what is within hitting range of a stick.”

Lily’s steps faltered and the pseudodragon hopped from her shoulder back to its human's as Shon continued towards Nangran. The smith turned, holding a sword with a black pommel across his bent arm.

“Sealing item?” Lily asked, scratching her neck.

"Pseudodragon?" the Mage barked over Lily's question, drowning it out, "You attracted a pseudodragon familiar?" Shon nodded, and Ryuuko whistled proudly, wrapping its tail around Shon's neck. The Mage sniffed and spat into the corner without further comment.

Shon reached out without hesitation and took the sword. The pommel flashed and turned a pale translucent blue with swirls of white moving around the core. The air around the smithy turned suddenly warm. And was growing warmer...

Lily wrapped her arms around herself, missing the refreshing cold, “Sealing item?” she asked again.

The Mage tapped his foot impatiently, “Yes yes, as requested.” he cleared his throat, “The Mages Guild hereby informs you of your responsibilities as a Sorcerer without clearance.” he recited quickly and with obvious annoyance, “You are to keep your item within fifteen feet of your person at all times, should you intentionally or unintentionally distance yourself from the item your rights shall be suspended and both you and your sponsor, the Temple of Hengist, will be held responsible for any damages that may have been inflicted on persons or property in the immediate vicinity. After review of such transgression, you may be required to surrender the item and instead receive a permanent sealing tattoo.”

“Sealing Tattoo!?” Lily shouted, interrupting the Mage’s recital. Shon only nodded at the Mage, slipping the sword over his shoulder and adjusting the strap across his chest. He seemed utterly oblivious to Lily’s distress. She let slip a whine of confusion, looking from Shon to Nangran, who narrowed his eyes at her.

“Yes, a sealing tattoo,” The Mage snapped his fingers, and Lily flinched, falling back a step. Though nothing happened her neck itched anyway. He shifted his glare from Lily back to Shon, who stood at attention and listened without comment, “Should you wish to pursue a clearance in future, you may, though at your own expense.” he finished.

“Thank you, Archmage Ivelm.” Shon addressed the Mage, then lifted his left fist into his right palm and bowed. Ivelm sniffed and spat in the corner.

Shon turned to Lily, and she rushed to him, grabbing his hands. Too distressed to find comfort in their continued chill, she begged, “What's he talking about?”

“The lad’s been given a sealing item to stop his magic,” Nangran explained gruffly, his eyes shifting from Lily to his forge. Lily didn’t look away from Shon, who just nodded in confirmation. Ryuuko let out a concerned whistle.

Stop his magic? Lily whimpered, “What do you mean stop his magic? Seal like lock away?”

“Lily, it’s okay…” Shon whispered, shifting his hands to grip her fingers.

Ivelm snorted, “A Sorcerer’s power comes from their blood. It can’t be fully contained. The item will draw his magic to it like a magnet, preventing it from manifesting. He will maintain his cold tolerance and touch, but anything that might leave his body will be stopped.”

“But how will he practice!” Lily shouted, her voice cracking, “If he can’t make ice, then he can’t learn to-”

“That's the point,” Ivelm snapped his fingers again, but Lily was too distressed to flinch, “He can’t make ice and thus can continue his training as a Paladin.”

“But-”

Shon squeezed her hands, “It’s okay, Lily.” 

“No, it’s not!” Lily wrenched her hands free, stepping away from him, “They can’t just lock away a part of you. Magic is part of who you are,”

“Calm down, lass…” Nangran said, and Ryuuko hissed over Shon's shoulder, but Lily couldn’t calm down. They didn’t understand.

“You just have to practice. Train. You said you wanted to perfect yourself.”

“Lily…” Shon reached for her again, but she pulled away.

“Lass!” Nangran shouted, finally drawing Lily’s eyes away from Shon to see the Smith staring at his furnace, shooting fire out into the smithy.

Lily ran.

She sprinted across the courtyard, sliding in the snow and falling to splash before the door to the fortress. She stumbled to her feet as the door opened and the first few Squires started out. “Lily? What’s wrong?” she shoved past them, and they fell back from her burning hands as she ran up the stairs.

The girl fell into Her room, Her door swinging with enough force to slam first into the wall and then closed. It clicked with a resounding finality, and She dropped to the ground covering Her ears.

‘Calm down, Red…’ She squeezed Her eyes shut,

‘If you can’t control it, Goldy, the Archmage will have to put the other collar back on…’ She struggled to breathe.

‘Firewyrm…’ Archmage Morndancer condensed from the darkness and She fell back from the memory, scooting across the floor until She hit the door, ‘you ARE fire, and so much more.’

‘We should just seal it. It’s too dangerous anyway,’ She felt Archmage Shaloon’s fingers brush Her neck, and screamed.

Her nails dug into the wood of Her door as She clawed Her way to the handle, shaking it violently before it finally pulled open, and She ran again. Down the hall and up a spiral staircase.

***

Shon started to follow Lily but hesitated, turning back to Nangran and Ivelm. They were both studying the furnace as the wild fire slowly died down. “Quite impressive…” Ivelm muttered, “I doubt that could ever be contained…” Shon shook his head and jogged out of the smithy.

Lily was nowhere to be seen, but the other Squires crowded around the door, whispering to each other, so Shon went that way, Ryuuko flying ahead of him. “Hey Shon, what happened?” Shon just shook his head, weaving through them and into the fortress, following the pseudodragon.

Lily wasn’t in the library or the classroom so Shon made for the guest rooms. His breath froze in his chest at the door left open and swaying lazily back and forth. Ryuuko swooped in then back out again with a disappointed chirp. “Squire? Shouldn’t you be at practice?” a Paladin exited his own room, stopping at the sight of Shon. Looking from Shon to the door, the Paladin glanced in then closed it with an echoing click, “Master Daunas will have your hide if you don’t double-time it down there…” he made to pat Shon on the shoulder as he passed but pulled his hand back sharply, wiping it on his shirt as he continued down the hall. Shon ignored the Paladin and made for the bell tower, Ryuuko flying at his side.

Lily sat on the windowsill, her knees pulled up to her chest and feet on the roof. She faced the sunset below the snow clouds, but her eyes were glazed over, not seeing it. “Lily?” some of the tension drained from her shoulders. Still, she didn’t look at him as he sat beside her, didn't even reach up to pet Ryuuko when the little dragon landed on her opposite shoulder and nuzzled her neck.

Her reaction didn’t make any sense. Why should she be so upset when she knew he just wanted to control the ice? Wanted to stop it from freezing the others so he could go back to training properly? But she was clearly very, very upset. “What's wrong?”

Lily hid her face in her arms, muffling her answer, “Is magic really so bad? Why does everyone want to seal it away?”

“It's dangerous,” Shon tried to explain, but the answer only made her squeeze in tighter, her nails digging into the flesh of her arms. “Lily, look, I can’t control my power. This will let me live my life and train without endangering the others.”

Lily looked up, her eyes red and puffy, “But you just need to practice. You can do both.” Shon shook his head. He couldn't. There was no way he could be a Sorcerer and a Paladin. Paladin’s were divine instruments of their god; they didn’t have the luxury of studying arcane magic. “But why? It's part of you-”

“I don’t want it, Lily,” Shon said sharply, and she flinched. Ryuuko hissed at him, and he looked away, not wanting to meet the betrayal in her eyes, “I’m a fighter. This just gets in the way.”

“Then I have to pick one?” Lily whispered, “Either my magic or learning how to fight like you?”

“You’re different, Lily, you can already control your magic, you-” but she was shaking her head, her entire body trembling.

“I’m more dangerous than anyone here. I… I killed them, all of them.” she held her head, grabbing her hair and burying her face in her knees, “I did it, I burned them. I AM my magic, and my magic killed them. I can’t even remember, and they’re all dead… Brom... Ran...” she pulled her hair, shaking her head in denial even as she listed the facts.

Ryuuko draped a wing over her head, and Shon grabbed her by the shoulders, but she didn’t look up. He shook her, but she was rocking limply in his hands. He pulled her in, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close.

She sobbed into his chest, “I tried so hard, practiced and practiced, until I could control it. It's me, it's who I am and all I have, and now they'll take it away…”

“Magic isn’t who you are, Lily,” Shon stroked her hair under the pseudodragon's wing, the heat of her skin calling to his magic, causing it to surge and cool him so he could continue holding her.

“It is!” Lily grabbed his shirt, twisting the fabric and pulling him closer, “It’s my blood and my body. Cutting it off is like cutting off my arms.” she looked up at him, and he could see the tears streaming freely down her cheeks, making her scarlet scales shine in the dying light, “And you… your ice is part of you too, and you want to lock it away.”

“I… it's different, Lily.” how could he possibly explain when he didn’t understand? He didn’t understand why she was so insistent or why his power should have any bearing on her own. “You do have control, Lily. You can get your clearance. No one is going to take your magic from you.”

He pushed her back but didn’t let her go, trailing his hand along her back and shoulder, then up to wipe the tears from her cheek without ever breaking contact, “My power just awakened, and I never asked for it, I don't want it. I’ve lived my whole life without it, and it will only stop me from becoming a Paladin unless I can control it, and I can't. I've tried.”

“You just need practice!” Lily shook him, and Ryuuko took flight, circling the bell tower before returning to land on Shon.

“Stop, Lily, please,” he pleaded with her, “I don’t want it, I just don’t. Don’t try and force this on me.” Lily covered her mouth her eyes wide. Shon wiped her other cheek free of tears, “I want to be a Paladin. It’s all I’ve ever wanted, and I can’t do both. I don’t have enough time to train in both, and I can’t practice my fighting as I am now.” her hands dropped, and he could see her lip trembling, “You can do both Lily, you already control your magic, so you just need to learn fighting. And you’re learning so fast! Please don’t cry…”

“I… I’m sorry…” she looked down, crossing her arms over her chest, “I don’t like it. I don’t like that you want to lock away a part of who you are. You said you wanted to perfect yourself and your magic is part of you…”

“Lily…”

“But…” she interrupted him, locking his eyes with hers, “I understand if you can’t work on it right now… It's like the stances, right? One thing at a time?”

Shon sighed, shaking his head, but said, “Yeah.” Ryuuko trilled.

“You can work on it after you become a Paladin…”

“Maybe,” Shon conceded.

*** 

Shon and Lily didn’t reappear until dinner. He didn’t want to leave her alone, and Lily needed to take extra time to compose herself. They sat together on the bell tower through the two-hour practice time and the following break. 

Lily spoke of how she used to burn papers and blankets at her tower. And what the Mage's would do to her when she did. Then she explained how she'd eventually learned to light candles and that now she could make images with her fire. She'd cupped her hands together and summoned a small fireball as she'd done on their first night of staff training. Then she shaped it, its core turning into a long flower bud before spiraling open into a six-petaled lily. She explained that she used to use the images to play with her ‘treasures,’ making rabbits and tiny dots for them to chase around their cages.

By the time the dinner bell interrupted her, she was smiling again and took Shon by the hand to go down for dinner. He marveled at the warmth of her fingers held unflinching in his cold palm.

The other Squires went silent as they entered the dining hall. Lily waved at them before going to the food table and making her plate. Shon didn’t look at them as he took his usual spot. Lily sat down across from him and stretched her leg out to brush his under the table while Ryuuko sat on the wood between their plates.

“Where were you?” Thom whispered to Shon’s right.

“Master Daunas is going to break you. You know that, right?” Rerves added. Shon could only nod. It was worth it.

Lily skewered an overly large cut of steak, asking, “So what did you guys learn this afternoon?” the sixteen Squires all down the table blushed in unison.

“Nothing.” Thom squeaked. Lily tilted her head at him.

“I…” Kefir shifted uncomfortably, “Maybe I’m just an early bloomer but… well…” he glanced at the other boys pleadingly, and Zihler came to his rescue,

“You’re not the only one, Kefir. I think that lesson was about five years late.”

Lily looked between them, then to Shon, “What did you guys learn?” she asked again.

“Boy stuff,” Baradin announced a little too loudly, then began shoveling food into his mouth so he wouldn't have to elaborate.

“Boy stuff?” Lily’s mouth twisted in doubt and continued confusion.

“Yep, boy stuff,” Rehlien said.

Lily puffed out her cheeks in annoyance, “Well, fine then. When I learn girl stuff, I’m not going to tell you guys anything.”

“Squire!” Shon jumped, his plate rattling as Weaponmaster Daunas shouted from right behind him, “Outside. Run. Now.”

Shon jumped to his feet, bumping the table and jostling those on the bench with him. Leaving his half-eaten dinner behind for Ryuuko to finish, he marched quickly to the door, Master Daunas hot on his heels.

He ran around the fortress through dinner, study time, and break, stumbling on numb feet and gasping for air. It was still worth it. 

***

Archmage Shaloon surveyed the modest horde from her mount. The draken fawned around her, mighty warriors brought low by their own stupidity and the beast she rode. “Tomorrow we march,” she called in draconic, “for the glory of Ryuugen!” the draken roared.

Shaloon smiled. Yes, these would serve as an adequate distraction while she retrieved their lost treasure. It would be a shame to lose so many, but any sacrifice would be worth getting the Firewyrm back.