When Matsias woke in the morning, he felt for a moment like nothing had changed but the lighting. Key was in her bed, reading. He was laying on Tilli's bed, and almost as soon as he woke up, Key looked over. He felt bad for her in that moment. She must have tended to him so much in the last year that she knew the exact moment he woke.
Key didn't mention it. "Want to get breakfast?"
"What time is it?" Mat searched for his watch on Tilli's desk, only to realize he was still wearing it.
"Just past seven."
Mat looked around. "Tilli never came back?"
Key swumg her legs off the bed. "She did say she'd probably miss curfew."
As Matsias stood up, he realized he was also still wearing his prosthetic. The stub of his leg ached, but he decided to ignore it.
They went to the cafeteria, where they filled Ayan and Miriam in on what had happened. "Why did they change their minds?" Miriam asked.
"Ms. Collins said another student spoke up for me." He thought it had been Key, but she looked as bewildered as him. He couldn't say in front of the girls that they might have changed their minds on account of him being Pelan, or that he felt guilty he might be getting special treatment.
When they finished breakfast, the girls went to class and Matsias returned to Ms. Collin's office. His stomach turned somersaults, and he tried to remind himself that he was staying.
Ms. Collins sat with her hands folded on top of her desk. Mrs. Wayteel sat nearby. He walked in and heard the door clang shut behind him, thought he knew in his head it probably barely clicked.
"Do you know why you're here, Mat?" Mrs. Wayteel asked him.
"I broke the rules and put everyone in Victoria House in danger."
"You can understand," the headmistress responded, "that it is difficult to retain a student who uses magic recklessly. But Ms. Collins believes she has a consequence more suitable than expulsion."
Matsias nodded and Mrs. Wayteel turned to look at Ms. Collins, waiting for her to speak.
"I suggest that Mat work three days a week in the infirmary," Ms. Collins said, "two of these days would be during the week, and one on the weekend. He would assist one of the upperclassmen, who is studying healing. I believe that provising a positive contribution to the community he is in will encourage him to show more thought to their welfare in the future."
Matsias didn't realize he was holding his breath until he let it out. Three days a week would keep him busy, but that was probably the point. And it was way better than expulsion.
"You said he would work with an uperclassman. Do you have a student in mind?" Mrs. Wayteel continued to watch Ms. Collins.
"Charlie Newman." Ms. Collins spoke without hesitation, and Matsias remembered the tall, round-faced boy she had introduced him to the day before. "Though we will have to change Mat's schedule."
Matsias had not been prepared for this."We wouldn't change which classes you're taking," Ms. Collins reassured him, "only which period you're taking them. That way, you can work with Charlie during his regular infirmary hours."
"We'll take care of that after quarter exams," Mrs. Wayteel added."You will also be required to see me once a week for counseling." Mrs. Wayteel had not moved from her position. Matsias felt the walls close in.
"What?" The room was hot and stuffy again. He wasn't sure he could sit in her every week.
"Mat," she said patiently as if he was a small child, "I understand your desire to conceal parts of your identity, but this problem began with secrets, so if you don't start talking to someone about them, I can't trust this won't happen a second time. And, as I said before, I can likely help you with these nightmares. But you have to be willing to work with me."
"Okay."
"Then you accept the terms?" Mrs. Wayteel asked.
Mat's stomach flipped again. "I guess I have no choice."
"Not if you want to stay." Mrs. Wayteel rose from her chair. "And I hope I need not remind you that if you are involved in another incident like this one, we may not be so lenient."
Matsias swallowed. "Yes, ma'am."
For the rest of the day, Mat felt like he was watching himself from a distance. He went to his classes and had dinner with the girls, as usual. He barely noticed the conversation, or what he was eating. As they walked back to Victoria House, Key checked in on him.
"How are you?"
"I don't know," he said honestly, "tired."
"I'm going to study with Ayan and Miriam in their room. You want to join us?"
"You're working on your sewing project, aren't you?"
Key grinned sheepishly. "Ayan helped me make the troucsers and the shirt, but I still need to finish the embroidery."
"Well, you should have your sewing circle. I'll be okay. I just want to rest."
"Well, you know where to find us if you change your mind."
"Okay." Mat hugged his sister as they reached the common and then went to his room. But he had forgotten about one thing. His roommate.
Reed was reading a book on his bed when Mat opened the door. He looked up and Mat stood frozen in the doorway. It was the first time they had really seen each other after the fire. As the other boy turned back to his book, Mat walked to his bed and took off his leg for the first time in two days. He massaged his stump for a minute. He wanted to lay down, but the silence felt too tense to relax.
"I'm... I'm sorry." He chanced a glance at his roommate.
At first, Reed didn't answer. Then he said, "What did you make it out of? The dream net?" He said the words dream net as if they tasted bad.
"Embroidery thread," Mat answered, "I got some from Ayan."
"Well, that's where you went wrong." Reed looked at him. "They're always made out of cotton cord. Did you not notice in that book of yours, or did you choose to ignore it?"
"I..." Mat wasn't sure what to say. This was not the reaction he had anticipated.
"Do you realize it takes years of apprenticeship to become a net maker? But you thought you could do it after a couple of weeks?" Reed snapped his book shut and stood up.
"Reed, I..."
Mat's roommate was at the door when he turned. "Please, don't. Bother apologizing if you can't do that right either." He left Mat in silence.
Mat sat for a moment, feeling like he might fall apart. He knew he wouldn't rest if he stayed here. But he didn't want to bother Key. Finally, he grabbed his crutch and went to Tisheet's room.
When the older girl answered the door, she wore a nightshirt and pajama pants. Even those were of Thisaazhou make--Mat recognized the embroidery at the collar.
"Im sorry," he said, "I didn't mean to wake you."
"Oh, you didn't. I just wanted to get comfy. It's Mat, right? What's up?"
"How much do you know about me?" he asked her in Zhohu.
"Why don't you come in?" She opened the door and Mat settled into the chair by Tisheet's desk. Tisheet herself perched cross-legged on her bed. "I know the Truuits adopted you after the temple fire in Illegate." Now she also spoke in Zhohu. "Is that what you wanted to talk about?"
"Actually, I don't think I want to talk about anything. I just don't want to be alone right now."
"Well, you're welcome to stay as long as you need, talking or no."
