Valiant: Tales From The Archive
[CURSEd #21: Subtle Pressures]
Log Date: 10/15/12764
Data Sources: Ilyana Kemaim
Valiant: Tales From The Archive
[CURSEd #21: Subtle Pressures]
Log Date: 10/15/12764
Data Sources: Ilyana Kemaim
Event Log: Ilyana Kemaim
Charisto: Synon Suburbs
9:57am SGT
“It’s a nice place.”
I glance at Dare. He’s staring out the tinted window at the suburban houses passing us by as we drive through one of the neighborhoods outside of Synon. Each one has a lawn, a driveway, a nice little house with manicured trees and flowerbeds. The lots aren’t very large, but each one is a neat little parcel of domesticity.
“Kinda boring, if you ask me.” I say. We’re currently being chauffeured in one of CURSE’s official sedans, logos on the door and the custom nameplate. Both of us are in our CURSE uniforms, removing any doubt that this is an official visit. “Places like this make me wanna scream.”
“It’s too conformist for you?” Dare guesses.
“Too neat and tidy and micromanaged and… yeah, conformist, I guess.” I sigh, running a hand through my hair. “Makes me want to find the nearest homeowner’s association and burn that shit to the ground. And dance in the ashes. And then smear them all over this seiso shit.”
“Whoa there, Laughing Alice. Dial it back a little bit.” Dare says, checking his uniform jacket again.
I snort at that. “I can almost sympathize with her.” I straighten up in my seat, tugging at my seatbelt. “Did SCION ever figure out if she was responsible for the string of psi murders on Snohjem?”
“He says he doesn’t think it was her. Apparently the murders were too neat and clean to fit her modus operandi.” Dare says, pulling out his phone and checking it. “His verdict was that it was probably some other psi operative. He said that she likes making a mess, and this wasn’t messy enough. Wasn’t messy at all, actually.”
“Well, he’s not wrong.” I mutter. “Can still remember the last years in the program having to deal with her shit. She put the ‘crazy’ in ‘crazy bitch’. And also the ‘bitch’ in ‘crazy bitch’.”
“So she put the ‘crazy bitch’ in ‘crazy bitch’.”
“Yup.”
“So if she’s not on Snohjem, where do you think she is?” he asks, setting his phone down. “Gearing up for another neuranium heist?”
“No tellin’, really.” I say, planting my elbow on the car door’s armrest and putting my chin in my hand as I look out the tinted window. “She was a feral dog back in the program. You could’t control her to save your life, or anyone else’s life. Once she got something in her head, she went after it, consequences be damned. Most we could hope for with her was pointing her at something we needed to deal with, and hoping she didn’t get distracted on the way there. It was like firing off an unguided rocket and hoping it didn’t kill anyone it wasn’t supposed to kill.”
“Back then there were people trying to control her, though.” Dare points out. “What’s she going to do now that she doesn’t have anyone holding her leash?”
“Honestly? Probably the same thing she was doing after the program fell, and before she was captured.” I shrug. “She showed she was capable of constructing her own psi bombs if she got her hands on enough neuranium. I wouldn’t put it past her to go back to terrorizing traditionalist regimes.”
“So why aren’t we getting after her, if she’s such a threat?” Dare asks. “With the kind of damage as she’s capable of, I figured we’d be prioritizing her.”
“We probably are. But you have to keep in mind it took us seven years for CURSE to capture her after the Challenger program fell, and it wasn’t because we were slacking.” I point out. “She was a priority the whole time, because she was one of the Challengers that was doing the most damage even after the program fell. It was hard for us to catch her because she’s powerful, and intelligent, and unpredictable. Don’t get me wrong, she’s a bitch. A crazy bitch. But she’s also a smart bitch.” I pause for a moment, then add, “Plus she was trained by Accounting.”
“Ah god. They taught her how to be an assassin on top of all that?” Dare puffs. “Seems like all the most problematic Challengers were trained by Accounting. Wasn’t Songbird part of that department too?”
“At least according to SCION. I don’t really remember Songbird being a big name in Accounting. Then again, maybe that’s how Kaiser wanted it.” I say, tapping a finger against the window. “He ruled Accounting with an iron fist. If he wanted to hide something from the other Accountants, we would’ve never found out about it.”
“It’s a shame the Valiant got to him before we did.” Dare says. “Hopefully we can prevent a repeat of that with this visit.”
“Hopefully.” I agree. “From what I can remember, Rockin’ Roll was a pretty reasonable type. I’m hoping that hasn’t changed over the last sixteen years.”
“He’s a shaper, right? Works with earth and stone?” Dare asks, watching as we glide past a local park.
“Yeah. He was a really good Challenger; really versatile. Strong on defense and utility, and could hold his own on offense as well. Good squad leader.” I say, leaning back in my seat. “All-around decent guy, honestly. The fact that he didn’t need the resettlement agreement speaks to that. He kept his nose clean and was never involved in any of the program’s major controversies.”
“We could do with more of that in the ranks.” Dare says, tucking his phone back into his pocket. “You think he’ll be interested in joining CURSE?”
I shake my head. “I can’t say for sure. I only knew him in passing; we rarely worked together and really only saw each other at the Bastions. I don’t know if he’s changed in the years since then. The package that the administration told us to offer him was pretty decent, but people like Rock aren’t the kind of people that are easily swayed by money or perks.”
“Why’s it gotta be so hard to hire good people?” Dare mutters. “I guess a generous salary just isn’t enough anymore.”
“It really isn’t.” I say, glancing at him. “People want a lot out of their jobs nowadays. A sense of purpose, personal fulfillment, opportunities for growth and advancement… a job isn’t just something you do anymore. It’s supposed to be your entire life, or something like that.” I look back out the window at the houses passing us by. “Might have something to do with the low marriage rate. If you’re not in a relationship, you have to find your fulfillment and growth somewhere else. One of the natural places to look for that is in a job.”
Dare notices. “Is that something you deal with? Since… y’know. The whole thing with aging really slow, and how that affects your relationships…”
“Or the lack thereof.” I say. “No need to mince around it, Dare, you can just come right out and say it. I’m not in a relationship because I’ll outlive all my partners a hundred times over. So yeah, I guess I try to find fulfillment in my job, since it’s hard to make things work long-term in my love life. No, I’m not bitter.”
“No, of course not.” he says as the car starts to slow down, and pulls up to a curb outside of one of the houses. I glance at him, then snicker.
“Alright, c’mon. Let’s get this over with; I hate having to wear this uniform.” I say, opening the door and stepping out as he does the same. “Feels like I’ve been stuffed in a straightjacket whenever I have to put it on.”
“Your cloaking suit’s literally skintight. Isn’t the uniform practically freedom compared to that?” Dare points out as he starts around the car.
“My cloaking suit wears like a second skin. Plus I look good in it. The uniform is just… tight in all the wrong places.” I say, hooking a finger in the shirt collar and giving it a tug as we make our way to the front door.
“Well. You still look good in it, if that’s worth anything.” he says, stepping up onto the porch and ringing the doorbell.
“Careful with those compliments.” I say, straightening out my jacket as I stand on the other side of the front door. “Spend them all on me, and you won’t have any left for Kwyn.”
He rolls his eyes at that, and we wait in silence for someone to open the door. It isn’t much longer before it swings open to reveal a tan, middle-aged woman, her eyes darting between the two of us. “Can I help you?”
“Hello. My name is Axiom, and this is Whisper.” Dare says, motioning to himself and me in turn. “We are Peacekeepers that work for Citizens United, and we were hoping to talk to Bylon Rush. Is he available?”
She purses her lips. “I don’t think so, but let me go check.” she says, before closing the door and leaving us on the porch. Both of us wait several seconds before speaking.
“She didn’t look too happy that we’re here.” I remark.
“No, she didn’t.” Dare agrees. “I wonder what that was all about.”
“Hope it’s not because he’s still loyal to the Challenger program.” I say, leaning to the side and peeking through one of the narrow slat windows on either side of the door. “It’s been dead and gone almost fifteen years. I was hoping he would’ve moved on by now.”
“Was that his wife that answered the door?” Dare wonders.
“Think so, yeah.”
“Maybe we interrupted something?”
“At ten in the morning? C’mon, Dare. Ain’t nobody getting frisky at ten in the morning.”
“I didn’t mean it that way.”
“Well, how did you mean it, then?”
“I dunno. Late breakfast? Yoga? Morning things, I guess.”
“No, I think she’s pissed for another reason.” I say, glancing at one of the slat windows again. “She’s taking her sweet time. Hope it’s not because she’s trying to smuggle him out the back door.”
Dare glances up. “I think SCION had drones in the area to keep track of stuff like that. Should I text him and see if he’s got an eye in the sky?”
I raise an eyebrow at him. “You gonna chase him if he runs?”
He shrugs. “Should we? Neither of have any of our kit, and he’s a shaper. Figure we’d be at a disadvantage.”
“I don’t even know what we’d do if he ran and we had to go catch him. Just the fact that he ran in the first place prolly means he’s not interested in joining.” I say, looking back towards the door. “It’s not like we have anything we can detain him on. He’s had a clean record since he left the program.”
“Think someone’s coming back.” Dare says, glancing at one of the slat windows. Both of us fall quiet, and a few seconds later, the door opens again, revealing a man in a polo shirt, jeans, and a streak of grey going through his closecut hair.
“Whisper, how’s it doing?” he says, offering a broad smile as he closes the door behind himself. “Long time, no see.”
I shrug. “ Hey, Rock. I’m good. You’re looking…” I size him up. Even if the years are showing, that polo shirt looks tight. Specifically across the shoulders and chest, and not the waist. “…damn. Are you still working out?”
“Yeah. Helps now that I’ve got a desk job. I don’t get out onto the construction sites as often anymore.” he says, starting past us. “I’ve got an idea of what you two are here for, so let’s take a walk and talk about it. The wife’s not a fan of the attention that comes with these kinds of visits.”
“Oh. Okay.” Dare says, glancing at me. I shrug, and start following after him. “Would you like to take the car instead?”
“Nah, it’s just a short walk down to the neighborhood park.” Rock says, walking over to our company car and knocking on the window until it rolls down. “Hey there, boss, we’re going to be taking a walk down to the park. You can follow if you want, or just hang out here. Shouldn’t take too long, I imagine.” With that, he’s already walking down the driveway, leaving us to follow.
“So you already know what we’re here for?” I ask, picking up the pace a little to catch up with him as he hits the sidewalk. “Did you know we were coming as well?”
“Sorta. Figured it’d only be a matter of time after Songbird visited.” Rock says, tucking his hands in his pockets.
“Wait, Songbird’s been here?” Dare demands, quickly catching up. “When?”
“Mmm… two months ago? Maybe three? It was a while.” he says. “Just about gave my wife a heart attack when he darkened my doorstep. You know, I almost didn’t recognize him at first. I think it was the hair that threw me. That bright blue is a one-eighty from the red he was rocking fifteen years ago.”
“Oh yeah, that’s right.” I muse. “He did have red hair back then, didn’t he? I’ve gotten so used to the recent wanted posters.”
“What did he want?” Dare asks, keeping pace close behind Rock.
“Same thing you guys probably want, and I’ll tell you two the same thing I told him.” Rock says, looking over his shoulder. “I’m not interested. I left that life behind. I don’t do that stuff anymore.”
“Oh, c’mon, Rock.” I say. “Seriously? You’d rather work a desk job instead of getting out and making a difference in the galaxy?”
Rock shakes his head. “Don’t get me wrong; what you guys do is important. Someone’s gotta be out there, fighting the good fight and keeping the peace. But that’s not me. I hung up my gloves a long time ago, and I’m in no position to be putting them back on.”
“You still have the skills, though.” Dare points out. “They might be rusty, but you have the combat and military training. Nothing a little refresher course couldn’t fix up.”
“I know I could brush up if I wanted to. But that’s not in the cards for me. I’ve got other responsibilities now.” Rock insists.
“If it’s about compensation—” Dare begins.
Rock shakes his head yet again. “I’m getting paid plenty as a project manager. It’s not obscene gobs of money, but it’s enough to be comfortably middle-class, and I’m okay with that. Don’t think I’d be comfortable with having piles of money shoved at me, anyhow.”
Dare looks at me, and I shrug. “Would you be interested in training new recruits?” I ask.
Rock scratches the back of his head, looking up at the sky. “That’s more appealing than going into the field, but I’d still have to decline. That’d require that I’d uproot and move to the CURSE HQ, and I can’t do that.”
“Damn. You’re stubborn.” I remark as we cross the road behind him.
“Is there a reason you can’t move to the CURSE HQ?” Dare asks.
“Yeah. It’s pretty simple; I’ve got kids.” he says, reaching the sidewalk on the other side of the road. “And yeah, I know the CURSE HQ has family housing and their own little school for the employees families that work and live aboard the station, but that’s not the point. I know the infrastructure and amenities are there, but this is where my kids have grown up. This is where their friends are. I’m not going to tear all that up and move my family somewhere else, and pretend that it’s going to be the same just because it happens to have a school there.”
Dare looks at me again, and I shrug. “What do you want me to tell him? That his kids can make friends at the HQ? The dude’s got his mind made up.”
“There’s really nothing that will get you to join CURSE?” Dare asks, looking to Rock.
“Really and truly. That’s not my fight anymore.” Rock says as we start passing by the neighborhood park. “Once you have kids, it changes things. You’re in charge of a little tiny person, and you’re gonna be in charge of them for twenty years. You’re responsible for teaching them everything and making sure that when they go out on their own, they're functioning members of society that can take care of themselves. It’s a really long, difficult project, and you can’t just abandon it halfway through. You’ve gotta see it through to the end. Because if you die or leave, there’s no guarantee they’ll get what they need to be contributing, functioning members of society.” He looks over his shoulder at us. “I don’t have the luxury of taking the risks of combat anymore. People depend on me. My wife depends on me. My children depend on me. I can’t take the risk that I might not be there to see that project through to the end. If you have your own kids one day, you’ll understand.”
I puff out a breath, looking at Dare. “Well, I guess that’s that. We can go back and tell the administration we gave it a try, but no dice.”
“Wait. We should at least get something out of this trip.” Dare says, before looking to Rock. “You said Songbird visited you two or three months ago. Tell us more about that.”
Rock turns, resting his arms on the fence as he looks out across the park. “Not much to tell, really. Came here for the same reason you guys did, got the same answer that you guys did. He was polite about it. Took it in stride.”
“How did that meeting go?” Dare asked. “Did he try to pressure you at any point, or threaten you into joining?”
Rock shakes his head. “Polite the whole way through. Honest, too. He let me know the Valiant couldn’t pay me what I was getting paid in the Challenger program. Wouldn’t have the same suite of benefits either. But they were still hoping I’d join.” He taps his hand against the railing he’s leaning on, then raises a finger. “He got this look on his face when I was telling him what I owed to my kids. Rueful, like it was something he wished he had. And then after that, he gave up and thanked me for my time. I remember that; that really stuck with me. I hadn’t really expected to see that out of him, not after everything I’d heard about him over the last decade and a half.”
Dare and I exchange looks, then I reply to Rock. “Don’t let that fool you. He’s dangerous; we’ve both seen it firsthand. He tore up a fully-armed CURSE convoy on his own, no backup and no support. Just because a wolf gives you puppy eyes doesn’t mean it won’t bite you.”
Rock gives a shrug. “Just tellin’ you what I saw, Whisper. I been around long enough to know there’s two sides to every story.”
“Just because there’s two sides doesn’t mean they’re both valid.” Dare says. “The Valiant are a group composed of rogue Challengers and vigilante mercenaries. They operate without the blessing of the Colloquium, and they’ve been a destabilizing force in the brief time they’ve existed. If they visit you again, you need to call CURSE and let us know — the galaxy’s a less safe place while they’re on the loose.”
Rock’s answer is yet another shrug. “Look, no offense, kid, but I know the party line when I hear it. Besides. They beat you to the punch on Mokasha, didn’t they?” Pushing off the railing, he turns and starts heading back the way we came. “But I’ve told you everything I know, and I’ve given you my answer on joining CURSE. Is there anything else I can help you guys with? I know some good places you can stop and have lunch at on your way back.”
Dare looks at me, and I shake my head. It’s not worth chasing it down at this point. At the end of the day, we can’t force people to join CURSE, and pushing isn’t gonna get us anywhere. Hitching my hands in my pockets, I start to follow after Rock. “Sure, why not. Do you know a place that does burgers and fries? I’ve got a craving.”
“Oh, tons. There’s this place that makes their own burgers on brioche buns, and the fries are done in-house…”
Myrrdicato Public Radio
“And now, the news.
“COS officials today reaffirmed the Confederacy’s commitment to retaking Mokasha, despite recent reports from various observers that the reclamation of the planet is now all but impossible. Speaking today at the daily press briefing, the press secretary for the Confederacy’s President acknowledged that most, if not all assimilated Mokashans were now beyond recovery, but cited the Confederacy’s ownership of Mokasha and its natural resources as justification for continuing the campaign to reclaim the system. Despite the COS’s commitment to retaking Mokasha, support for the campaign has declined in the Colloquium, with some senators starting to make statements advising the Confederacy to withdraw from the system and consolidate their forces among the other systems of the Confederacy.
“In Mercurial space, the Vaunted announced the success of a sting operation that resulted in the exposure and raiding of a secret Fringe Foundation facility. Several Fringe agents were taken into custody, alongside local members of the Mercurial government who were implicated in allowing the facility to operate unimpeded. Several experiments in progress were also seized, and it is assumed they will be held and used as evidence in the trials that are likely to be brought against the arrested individuals.
“In the Colloquium, tempers flared as the senator from the Venusian Monarchy accused the Viralix Empire of standing by and doing nothing while the Collective attacked Mokasha. The Viralix Empire, which maintains a working relationship with the Collective due to neighboring their territory in several regions, has famously been known to remain neutral in conflicts between the Collective and other nations. This neutral stance is thought to be the result of a longstanding, informal agreement where the Collective will not infringe on Viralix space so long as the Viralix do not interfere in Collective expansion elsewhere. It has served as a point of friction in many prior Collective incursions where the Viralix have chosen not to participate in the conflict unless it directly threatens their own territory.
“Finally, the semifinals for the Galactic Zero-Gravity Competitive Dance Scene will be held today in high orbit around Talingrad. Making it into the penultimate round are contestants from the Venusian Monarchy, the Marshy Republic, and the Rantecevang Diaspora. The competition between the elven and vashaya’rei pairs in the doubles event is expected to be particularly fierce, as it is most years.
“The time is now 11:54am, Standard Galactic Time. Next up: news from your local MPR member station.”
Event Log: Ilyana Kemaim
C.V. Mediator: Axiom’s Quarters
3:07pm SGT
“So when are we leaving orbit?” I ask.
“Depends on system control. Think we’re queued up but they’re making us wait in one of the commercial lanes instead of getting us an expedited lane.” Dare answers over the clicking of the buttons on his controller. Currently we’re both on his bed, running a few rounds of Rant Legends on the screen against the far wall. “If that’s the case, we might not leave the system until tonight.”
“Fine by me. Lets us squeeze in a few more matches.” I mutter from where I’m sitting between Dare’s legs, reclined against his chest. Both of us started sitting up, but we’ve slowly devolved into slouching on the bed, Dare against the headboard and me against Dare. “I need to feel like I’ve achieved something with this trip, and winning a few matches might be the only thing I get out of this.”
“Yeah, that was a bit of a disappointment.” Dare says from behind me. “You can’t win ‘em all, I guess. Roamer’s comin’ up through the grass, by the way.”
“Yeah, I saw ‘im.” I say, angling my character away and back down the lane we’re sharing. “Honestly, I don’t know why we didn’t just, like. Send a letter or give him a call and leave it at that. HQ basically sent a whole-ass frigate out here just to have Rock tell us no. We could’ve gotten the same answer through an email, and saved ourselves a ton on fuel and time. Just seems like a big waste of time to me.”
“Maybe they were going for the personal touch.” Dare says. “An email is easy to shrug off, but it’s hard to say no to someone showing up at your door.”
“I guess.” I puff. “Just seems like a big waste of time and fuel to me. But hey, I’m not paid to make executive decisions. If the administration wants to use their resources that way, who am I to tell them otherwise.”
“I mean, it’s a fair point.” Dare says. “I’m just playin’ devil’s advocate. Oh, don’t go near that bush—”
“Shit shit shit I’m getting caught out—” I hiss, hunching forward and mashing my controller as I get ambushed. My side of the screen greys out as I get killed, and I flop back on Dare’s chest, letting out a sigh. “Our roamer is trash.”
“Yeah. Think we’ll be playing safe this match and hope the others can win their lanes.” Dare says, lifting his hands a bit so the back of his controller is resting on the top of my head. “You mind if I try to do Phoenix roam after this? Need a change of pace and I want to get out of lane for that.”
“Yeah, I can go mid roam.” I say, picking at a hole in the jeans he’s wearing. “Not gonna lie, I’m kinda bummed that Rock turned us down. I get it if he doesn’t want to go into the field anymore, but at the very least he could’ve trained new operatives.”
“I mean, I kinda get it.” Dare says. “He’s got a family now. It’s hard to make career changes like that when you’ve got a family. Especially when your family’s relying on you.”
“Family schmamly.” I scoff, snagging my items before piloting my character back out to the lane. “My dad never thought twice about moving us from world to world for his work as a researcher. I was able to make new friends on each world. Rock’s kids can do the same, it ain’t gonna kill them.”
“Yeah, but that didn’t exactly give you a good relationship with your parents, did it?” Dare points out.
“Yeah…” I concede. “How about you? How’s your family doing?”
I can feel Dare shrug behind me. “Same old. Mom and Dad are a little concerned about me, mostly the fact that Peacekeepers are being deployed more actively and are getting more combat exposure. I’ve told them not to worry about it, but that’s like telling a river not to run.”
“Hey, at least you’re still on talking terms with them.” I say. “You going to visit them for Krysmis this year?”
“Depends. With things ramped up the way they are, I doubt I’d be able to take holiday leave. I’ll try for it, but I wouldn’t be surprised if something keeps me at work.”
“Well, even if you do get stuck at HQ for the holidays, there’s still me and Kwyn and Kent. We’ll keep you company.” I point out, then tilt my head. “Huh, looka that. Looks like the other team forfeited.”
“They were getting drubbed on mid and top.” he says, setting his controller aside as we’re loaded onto the postgame screen. “You think there are any other Challengers that have started families since the program collapsed fifteen years ago?”
I look back at him. “Well, prolly, yeah… why?”
He reaches up, rubbing the back of his neck. “I dunno, I just… I kept thinking about it on the way up to the ship. If Rock started a family, then I figure some of the others probably settled down as well. Especially the ones that took the resettlement agreement. I mean, that was the whole point of what CURSE was trying to do, wasn’t it? Force them out of the Challenger program and into normal lives.”
“Why’s that matter, though?” I ask.
He scratches at his ear. “Shouldn’t we be leaving them alone, instead of trying to track down the ones we can find and recruit them? We’re the ones that wanted them to stop, that pushed them into these lives, and now we’re coming back, asking them to leave the lives we pushed them into. Should we be doing that? It doesn’t seem right. Especially if they might have kids, families.”
I shrug. “Maybe. But life isn’t fair. CURSE is doing what it has to in order to keep the galaxy a bit safer, and sometimes that means walking back decisions you may have made once upon a time. I’m pretty sure no one thought that’d we eventually be trying to recruit the Challengers we forced into retirement, but the situation’s changed, so we have to adapt to handle it. That’s not giving up your principles or going back on your word; that’s just dealing with the reality of a dynamic universe.”
“Yeah. I guess. We wouldn’t survive for very long if we didn’t adapt to the galaxy changing around us.” he concedes. “What did you think about what Rock said about Songbird?”
I set my controller aside. “What part? He said a few things about Songbird.”
“The part about Songbird wanting kids.”
“Oh, that part.” I say, rolling on my side a little so I can look at him without straining my neck. “He can’t have kids, can he? He’s a vampire. They’re sterile; they can only reproduce by converting other humans.”
“Yeah.”
“Well, no point in wishing for kids if you can’t have them.”
“But don’t you think it’s weird that he does want them?” Dare insists, gesturing vaguely. “It’s strange; he’s one of the most notorious outlaws in the galaxy. Outlaws aren’t usually the type to want families.”
I shrug. “Maybe Rock just misread his reaction.”
Dare doesn’t look convinced by that, but doesn’t reply right away. Instead, he fiddles with one of the analog sticks on his controller for a bit, and I can tell something’s on his mind.
“Alright, big guy.” I say, flicking him in the chest. “Spit it out. What’s on your mind.”
“I just… it bothers me.” he sighs. “The more I find out about him, the more it feels like he’s not the person the media portrayed him as. He becomes less of a big bad guy and more of a relatable person.”
“Songbird wanting kids is relatable to you?” I ask, raising an eyebrow.
“Well, not that specifically, just the… wanting a family thing, I guess.” he mutters. “I can understand that part, that impulse. And being regretful about not having it.”
It’s easy to read between those lines. “You’ve wanted kids?”
He shrugs, looking away. “I mean… I’ve thought about it from time to time. It’s not like I’m craving it, but it’s just something that’s been there, vaguely, at the back of my head for years. When I was younger, I told myself that I had time and it would happen when it happened, but I’m starting to hear the clock ticking. The longer you wait, the older you are when you start, and… I dunno, I just feel like it’s different if you have kids once you get into your middle age. It’s hard to explain. Just doesn’t seem as optimal as having them when you’re younger, and…” He reaches up, rubbing his hands over his face. “Ignore me. I probably don’t even know what I’m talking about. Haven’t been in a relationship for years, I dunno what I’m even doing, talking about kids.”
I’m quiet at that, sorting through his words. Understanding what he was getting at, even if I don’t really have words for it myself. I’ve had those thoughts, had this kind of conversation with myself several times over the six centuries I’d been alive.
“Whisper?” Dare says, noticing I’m quiet.
“Sorry. I was just thinking.” I say. “I get what you’re saying. Thinking about having kids but unsure if you ever will.”
“Is that something you wanted?” he asks, sounding a little surprised.
I shrug. “Sorta… maybe. I dunno. It’s complicated. There is a little bit of pressure in wereckanan culture to have kids. Because we’re so long-lived, and it takes our offspring three centuries to mature, our population is… brittle. If we experience a mass-casualty event, it’s a lot harder for us to recover from it, which is why the wereckanan have been very deliberate about settling a lot of worlds and spreading out our population. There’s a lot of policies in wereckanan society that incentivizes and supports the formation of family units. You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but you’re rewarded for doing so.” I shake my head at that point. “I mean, that’s not the point, I wouldn’t be doing it for the support programs. Just explaining some of the subtle pressure that’s there.”
“So it’s something you feel like the rest of your species expects you to do?”
“Yeah, but not just that. I just always…” I shift a little now, aware that I’m still lying against him, and we’re having this conversation about a really intimate topic, and I know that in spite of that, he’ll still be completely clueless. Oh well. “…I just felt like… it’s something I want to do? Like… to leave behind a legacy. Have a kid, raise them, teach them everything that we are, everything that we can be, and have that be my contribution to the galaxy. I wanted to leave something behind.” I go quiet for a bit, thinking about the weight of those words. It’d been years since I said them out loud. “Sounds kinda vain, now that I hear myself saying it.”
“No, that’s fine. It makes sense.” Dare says. “To me, at least. If you have a kid, you want to make sure you do a good job with them. Leave behind a good legacy, like you said.”
I’m quiet for a moment, wondering if I should ask what I’m about to ask. Wondering if it would be pushing too far. But he won’t read between the lines, and I don’t think it’d hurt to ask and see if I could satisfy my curiosity. “…how many kids would you have? If you did have someone. And you didn’t have to worry about work getting in the way.”
He opens his mouth, then closes it, looking thoughtful. “Oh, that’s… I suppose it’d depend on what my wife would want… but if she was okay with it, I’d want three kids. Not too many, not too few. A mix of boys and girls.”
I smile at that. “Your wife? Getting married would be a requirement for having kids?”
“I mean, I wouldn’t say it’s a requirement, but I do feel like it’s better for the kids, you know?” he says, adjusting the pillows behind him so he’s not slouching as much. “It’s hard doing the single-parent thing. I wouldn’t want to go it alone; I’d want to do it with someone else. If there’s two of you, one can bring in the money while the other focuses on raising the kids and giving them the support they need at home.” He picks at the cover on his bed, fiddling with it. “Maybe that’s just me, having been raised in a Christling household. I remember my dad getting a better job when I was young. It paid enough so that my mom could stop working and spend more time raising us. It made a difference, having her around more… not one that I appreciated at the time, but looking back on it, it was a good thing. I think it kept us out of some trouble we might’ve gotten into otherwise.”
“Yeah… yeah, that’s fair, I guess. It’s harder to raise kids alone.” I admit. “I know I could do it alone, if I needed to… but I wouldn’t want to.”
“What about you?” he asks. “How many would you want if the circumstances were perfect?”
I don’t have to think about that for very long. “Two. I think two would be good for me. Well, I mean, I think two is the most I’d want at a single time. It takes wereckanan kids almost fifty years to get to the human equivalent of eighteen years old, so… yeah. Just two at a time, that’s all I’d be able to handle.”
“Oof.” Dare winces. “Having to deal with teenagers for… what, twenty years? I don’t know how that scales, with the aging…”
“It’s one-to-one with human aging for the first fifteen years, then it starts slowing down once they hit sixteen. But yeah, they don’t hit the human equivalent of twenty for like another seventy-five years after that. I can show you a chart sometime so you can see the aging curve over the course of a wereckanan’s life.”
“Geez, that lasts forever. How do you guys even do families like that in wereckanan society?” Dare says, running a hand through his hair. “Can’t imagine keeping a kid in the house for fifty years.”
“We start giving them more freedom in their twenties going into their thirties. It’s gradual, and we let them roam away from home more and more as they get older, continue their education, find jobs.” I say. “It’s hard to really explain it; it’s just built into our culture. Our society is different than yours in a lot of fundamental areas, and that’s tied back to the fact that we live so much longer. We look at at lot of issues a lot differently than younger species do.”
“Makes sense.” Dare says, clearly still ticking through the implications in his head. “You’d have to change a lot of things when there’s a fifty-year gap before the next generation is legally considered adults. Guess this is why you never see wereckanan minors outside of wereckanan space.”
“Yeah. It’s just easier to raise them on a wereckanan world. The infrastructure and support for it doesn’t really exist outside of wereckanan systems, so wereckanan will often come back to wereckanan worlds to raise their kids.” I explain. “Which is another reason I’ve never had kids. Having to leave everything and head back to wereckanan space for fifty years minimum would mean that all the people I knew and cared about would be gone, dead, or moved on by the time I came back.”
“Man. That’s rough.” he says, shaking his head. “I don’t envy you that.”
“Longevity has a price. Once people realize that, they become less envious of the fact that we can live for thousands of years.” I say, looking back to the screen across the room. “Ready to queue up again?”
“We’re prolly pushing our luck, but sure.” he says, snagging his controller again. “Although, we really should do something besides grind video games for hours on end…”
“Pish posh. This is the only time we’re going to have a connection to the galaxynet. There’ll be plenty of time to do other stuff while we’re in tunnelspace.” I say, rolling on my back once more and grabbing my controller. “You still gonna try for Phoenix roam on this next match?”
“I’ll give it a shot. Been a while since I did roam, so I can’t promise I’ll be any good, but I’ll try.”
“I won’t complain so long as you come gank for me.”
“I’ll try. You know how roam goes.”
“Hey, you’re the one that wanted to do it.”
“What can I say, I’m a masochist.”
Intercepted Transmission
CURSE Relay Satellite
11:38pm SGT
Nazka: Evening, Administrator. How did the meeting with the Venusians go?
Tenji: As well as can be expected. They’re not happy we moved into a Marshy system, but we did prevent that assassination attempt on the Monarchy a while back, so they are still in our corner… for now. What about the Mercurials?
N: You know Mercurials; they’re hard to get a read on. They did telegraph that they were not happy with our move to Marshy space, but there was no indication — at least from the meetings that I had — that they intended to act on it. However, it was strongly implied that they intend to take a neutral stance with regards to the Valiant, and that if we wanted to change that, they would expect something out of us in turn.
T: No surprises there. Living up to their reputation, that’s for sure.
N: Yes, but at least we have the reassurance that they will embrace practicality and profit over principles. We cannot say the same for the other nations.
T: Are there any others that are starting to show sympathy to the Valiant?
N: Not on the surface, but there are… changes. The fall of Mokasha has complicated the calculus here in the Colloquium, along with the fact that the Valiant have reclaimed Sunthorn. They’re not just a ragtag band anymore; they have access to powerful tech, and they are recruiting. The Valiant now have potential to be a powerful ally, and the Colloquium’s member nations are sensitive to that, especially after what happened to Mokasha. If I had asked these senators to condemn the Valiant the same time last year, they would’ve done it and not thought much about it. Now I can barely find anyone to commit to even that. They are all angling to take a neutral stance on the Valiant, so they can make a quick pivot to supporting them in case it becomes advantageous to them.
T: Mmm. But no outright supporters?
N: Aside from the Viralix and the Masklings, no. But that may also change soon. The senators here are starting to realize the Viralix and the Masklings are starting to see returns on the early risk that they took. Some of the staff I spoke with on the side are expressing regret that their senators missed the window for getting in on the founder’s round. Nobody wants to be on the last one to the negotiating table with an organization that has access to a Bastion and legacy Challenger tech.
T: Momentum is building in the Valiant’s direction, then.
N: It feels like it, yes. If we don’t do something to blunt it or slow it down, I think we run the risk of seeing support for the Valiant snowball. I’ve heard rumors in some of the darker corners that the Rantecevang Diaspora is in talks with the Valiant.
T: The Diaspora isn’t part of the Colloquium, though.
N: Exactly. They want to get their stake in the organization before the Colloquium nations do. It may be their hope that they can dissuade mainstream nations from establishing a relationship with the Valiant, or get a headstart on cultivating a working partnership with them. Whatever the reason, the Diaspora is at the table, and other nations will start looking for their own seats at the table if we don’t do something about it.
T: Understood. I will raise this with the Board when I meet with them. How quickly do you think other nations will try to come to the table with the Valiant?
N: That depends, but I imagine the timeline is measured in months and news cycles. They will want to make their turn by degrees; a sudden about-face risks drawing attention and charges of hypocrisy, especially if they took stances against the Valiant prior to this. Positions have already changed behind closed doors, but it will take time for that to reflect in public. That gives us a window to do damage control, to make overtures and try to maintain the status quo. It is not going to be easy — we are going to need to make strong arguments, present a compelling case, and invest resources towards maintaining some of these relationships.
T: We have lobbyists for a reason. I will let the Board know that we need to shore up our political front. We’re too busy dealing with day-to-day operations to be feeding egos in the white tower; we have better things to do than hobbing nobs with Colloquium grandstanders that run their mouths for a living. Is there anything else I should take back to my meeting with the Board?
N: There are more items, but nothing that rises to the level of the subjects we’ve already discussed. I have notes; I’ll send them to you.
T: Noted. Take care, Nazka.