Valiant: Tales From The Archive

[CURSEd #24: Mixed Signals]

Log Date: 11/10/12764

Data Sources: Darrow Bennion

Event Log: Darrow Bennion

CURSE HQ: Administrator Tenji’s Office

5:08pm SGT

It’s quiet in the office.

None of us have said anything so far. Mostly because much of what could be said was already said during the trip back to the HQ. And now here we were, in three chairs front of Tenji’s empty desk, waiting for the Administrator to arrive. Kwyn on my right, Whisper on my left.

“So.” Whisper says at length. “Considering we’re prolly gonna get our asses grilled, you guys wanna hit Gritter’s after we get chewed out?”

I puff out a long breath. “Not sure. Depends on how bad the chewing out is.”

“Let’s just get through it.” Kwyn says quietly. Clearly she’s dreading this as well.

We don’t end up waiting much longer, because the door to the office spirals open about half a minute later. I almost turn, but I hear the click of heels, plus the softer susurration of fabric over the floor, and I already know that it’s Tenji, followed by Nazka. In short order, they’ve walked around our chairs, Tenji sitting down behind her desk while Nazka moves to the glass wall behind her desk. He starts pulling up screens on the glass, while Tenji simply leans back in her chair and studies the three of us.

“Well.” she begins. “I suppose first and foremost, we’re glad that you’re alive.”

My dread only deepens. The fact that Tenji is letting Nazka handle the screens so she can devote her full attention to us is not a good sign.

“The funny thing is, I’m getting a powerful feeling of deja vu. You know why that is?” she continues. When none of us answer, she goes on. “Because exactly one year ago — I kid you not, I checked the date and everything — I was sitting in this office, with the three of you in front of me like you are now, having a conversation about not hiding your powers. And yet here we are, once again coming off an assignment that went sideways, about to have that same conversation all over again. So you’ll forgive me for wondering if the three of you learned absolutely nothing from that little chitchat we had a year ago.”

Kwyn and I both wince at that. Whisper just folds her arms. Exactly as unrepentant as she was a year ago.

Tenji turns her gaze to me, reaching up and adjusting her glasses. “So. I don’t really see a point in beating around the bush. Is there anything you would like to share with us, Axiom?”

I take a deep breath. “It’s… I didn’t mean any harm by it, I just… I wasn’t equipped, I wasn’t prepared to deal with… with, uhm…”

“With the fact that you ended up with the Spark after Chibundi, and you lied to everyone about it?” Tenji says, raising an eyebrow.

I look down. “Yeah. Yeah, I know. It’s… can I just say something in my—”

“Well of course he lied about it.” Whisper speaks up. “The hell were you expecting him to do? Axe has never had powers. He doesn’t have magic; he’s not a psion; and he’s human, which is about as vanilla as it gets. No offense, Kwyn.”

“Oh. Uhm. None taken.” Kwyn says quietly.

“Point is, Axe doesn’t know shit about this stuff.” Whisper goes on before Tenji can respond. “And I already know what you’re going to say: that if he’d told the rest of you, you could’ve put something together to help him learn it. But that’s ignoring the massive pressure that all of you were going to put on the person that ended up with the Spark.”

Nazka turns from the glass wall, his cold grey eyes locking onto Whisper. “Power comes with responsibility. This is not something that should have to be told to Peacekeepers; it is inherent in the gravity and the prestige of the position. To have powers, but to hide them and not use them for the benefit of others, is a dereliction of a Peacekeeper’s duties.”

“Yeah, well here’s the thing: he never asked for this, did he?” Whisper retorts. “We took a bunch o’ Peacekeepers to Chibundi, hoping one of them would end up with the Spark, but half of them didn’t even know what we were looking for until we ended up in some hypernatural ethics test! And the rest that knew what we were looking for, went with the expectation that other people would get it, because they would be more worthy than us. And to top it off, whoever ended up with the Spark was always going to have a massive burden dropped on them, because the whole reason we wanted a Spark in the first place was to compete with Songbird. Songbird. The guy that killed Nova, destroyed a full convoy, and rolled an entire squad of Peacekeepers — you included, Nazka! — and he did it without even busting out his Spark. And you guys wanted to take the Peacekeeper that ended up with a Spark, and throw that person at Songbird? Did either of you stop to think about how terrifying that would be? Especially for someone that doesn’t know how to use a Spark? For someone that has literally no powers and no experience with these sorts of things? So yeah, of course he lied about it! I probably would’ve lied too, knowing that the moment the administration found out, they would’ve chucked me at Songbird hoping I could compete with him!”

“You are out of line, Peacekeeper—” Nazka begins icily.

Tenji lifts a hand, cutting him off; it’s clear that Nazka has plenty to say, but he corks it while Tenji takes a measured breath, and returns her attention to Whisper. “You make a valid point, Whisper. There is massive pressure on the person that carries a Spark. And you’re also correct in pointing out that Axiom is far less equipped to deal with it than most other Peacekeepers would’ve been.” She looks to me at this point. “But Peacekeepers are CURSE’s elite for a reason, Axiom. We do not hide from challenges; we face up to them. You should know this better than most — your callsign literally means universal truth. An axiom is a fundamental truth accepted by all. You cannot live up to that while deceiving others, even if it is well-intentioned.”

I exhale, finding it hard to look at her. It hurts, but she’s right. I’m a Peacekeeper; I shouldn’t have run from this. “Yeah.” I admit. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have tried to deal with it on my own. I just…” I pause for a moment. “No. That’s on me. I should’ve asked for help earlier. I’m sorry.”

Tenji’s expression softens. “I don’t like coming down on my Peacekeepers, Axiom. But this is… you are the weapon that we didn’t know we had. The weapon that we could’ve used earlier if we’d known we had it. The last several months could’ve gone much differently if we had known you had the Spark. We could’ve had you trained months ago; you could’ve been making a difference months ago. Some of our clashes with the Valiant could’ve had much different outcomes if we could’ve had a Spark deployed to those engagements. Things at the Cradle might’ve gone much differently if we’d known you had the Spark. We can’t change the past, but there’s a lot of opportunities we missed because of this. A lot of injured CURSE operatives that you might’ve been able to protect. I need you to understand that.”

I nod meekly. “Understood, Administrator.”

“Not to detract from the severity of Axiom’s dereliction, but I must question if he was the only one at fault here.” Nazka says tersely. “I found Whisper’s rather lively defense of Axiom interesting, in that she seems to be quite intimate with Dare’s internal struggle over the responsibility of carrying a Spark.”

I start to speak, but Whisper beats me to it. “Yeah, I knew he had the Spark. I was trying to help him figure it out, without the pressure of you lot breathing down on his neck. That’s what friends do. You got a problem with that?”

I give a resigned puff and look at her. “Just because I’ve dug a grave for myself doesn’t mean you have to grab a shovel and dig a spot right beside me.”

Tenji raises an eyebrow, and glances at Kwyn. “And you, Little Wolf? Is there anything you’d like to share with us?”

“No.” Whisper and I say at the same time, cutting Kwyn off before she can answer.

Tenji’s other eyebrow comes up, her attention returning to Whisper and myself. “That was rather… forceful.” she observes.

“Kwyn didn’t know I had the Spark.” I say immediately.

“This is on me and Axe. Leave Junior out of it.” Whisper adds. “She’s been through enough in the past few weeks. She doesn’t need to be catchin’ smoke for something she wasn’t involved in.”

“Guys, I can speak for myself—” Kwyn begins. Without meaning to, both Whisper and I turn and stare at her at the same time. We must be wearing some kind of look, because Kwyn’s protest peters out, and she quickly turns her attention back to her hands in her lap.

Behind her desk, Tenji watches this exchange with something approaching bemusement, glancing to Nazka, who merely shrugs. Looking back to us, Tenji speaks again. “I have the feeling that even if Little Wolf was involved, you two would not leave any proof of it intact. Whisper, I don’t feel like repeating myself, so everything I said to Axiom also applies to you. Maintaining this deception, keeping this secret, has cost the organization in several ways. Do it again and there will be consequences. Do both of you understand?”

“I understand.” I say quietly.

“Yeah, whatever.” Whisper says, folding her arms and slouching in her chair.

“Good. With that out of the way, we now need to focus on the future, and that involves training for you, Axiom.” Tenji continues. “What is the extent of your familiarity with the Spark, Axiom?”

“Oh. Well, it’s… how do you mean that, exactly?” I say, not sure what’s being asked here. “Are you asking if I can control it, or…?”

“Control is one part of it, but we would also like to know if you understand its mechanisms. How it functions. The outer limit of what it is capable of.” Nazka says. “These are all important details as it pertains to abilities and powers. It helps us ascertain your potential utility in the field, and by better understanding how your powers work, you can better identify your weaknesses, strengths, and potential creative applications of those powers. It may also provide us insight into the weaknesses and strengths of those that have abilities similar to yours.”

“In other words, figuring out how your Spark works may help us come up with countermeasures for Songbird’s Spark.” Tenji explains.

“Countermeasures that aren’t just ‘find another Spark and throw it at Songbird’.” Nazka adds drily.

“Ah. Umn. Okay then.” I say, rubbing my palms against my knees, trying to figure out how to phrase this without sounding like a mental case. “So, the Spark, it’s like. Well. It’s uh… it’s like a bunch of people. In my head. Telling me how to do stuff.”

The office is silent for a moment. Tenji folds her arms on her desk, leaning forward a little. “Could you elaborate on that?”

I click my teeth together, glancing at Whisper. She just shakes her head. “It’s just gonna sound weird no matter how you say it, so you might as well get it over with.”

“Alright.” I huff, looking back towards Tenji, and noticing Kwyn’s staring at me now. “It’s like… other people have had this Spark before me, and there are echoes of all of these people in my head. The Spark has only triggered once, but while it was triggered, I could do stuff I’ve never had the ability to do. I had access to a lot of power… I don’t know where it was coming from. But these echoes were telling me how to use it. How to do things with it. Guiding me, if that makes sense.”

“Indeed.” Nazka says, showing very faint signs of interest. The condescending tone has disappeared from his voice, if only temporarily. “And do you know what triggered the Spark? If you do, would you be able to trigger it at will?”

I think back to the encounter with Laughing Alice in the hangar. I know exactly what triggered the Spark, but it’s not something I’m going to say here in front of everyone else. “High-pressure situations, I think? It’s not something I can trigger at will, I think. At least not yet. I need more time to figure it out.”

Tenji glances at Nazka. “That lines up with the research we’ve seen on Sparks, what little of it there is.” she says. “And unfortunately, that makes it inherently difficult to train. Replicating high-pressure situations is not easy to do, at least not safely.”

“Agreed. That will place some heavy limits on what we can train, and how much training we will be able to provide.” Nazka concurs. “Of the Peacekeepers we have available, I think Ironfist would be the best candida—”

“I can train him.” Kwyn says suddenly.

That catches everyone off guard. “Pardon?” Tenji says, like sure was unsure she’d heard Kwyn right.

“I can train him.” Kwyn repeats. “What he’s describing, carrying a convocation within himself — I am familiar with that. I have helped people with things like that before. I’m not sure I can teach him how to harness it — that’s probably gonna depend on the Spark, and whether it wants to cooperate with him — but I can teach him how to communicate with it. And that might help him understand it, and get closer to controlling the times when he can use it.”

“Huh.” Tenji says, glancing to Nazka. “What do you think, Nazka?”

“It’s certainly possible, given what I know of Little Wolf’s breed of magic.” he says, although the disapproval in his voice is clear. “Personally, I think a more experienced arcanologist would be a better fit for the job, but I do not have the kind of spare time required for this kind of training, and I am not sure our other magically-inclined Peacekeepers have the experience or skill needed to take the particular approach that Little Wolf is suggesting. My concern is with the appearance of a feedback loop here; it raises some eyebrows when the trainee turns around and starts training her mentor.”

“Appearance is irrelevant.” Tenji says. “This is a Spark. Our only Spark. And possibly the only Spark we’ll ever get our hands on. We need him trained, by whatever means available. If Little Wolf can do that, we’ll have her do it.”

Nazka inclines his head. “Understood. Then in that case, against my reservations, Little Wolf may be the best candidate for that at the moment.”

“Good. Little Wolf, you have permission to train Axiom.” Tenji says. “If you need resources, simply ask and they will be given. I also want a writeup on exactly what your approach will be, and what you hope to achieve with it.”

“Understood. I’ll have that to you as soon as possible.” Kwyn promises.

“I look forward to seeing it.” Tenji says, straightening up. “Now if that’s all, we’ll—”

“Wait, you’re not gonna chew us out for losing the artifact?” Whisper says, her brows furrowing. “I thought for sure you’d eat us alive for that.”

“We are not indiscriminate with our blame.” Nazka replies tersely. “The intelligence department reviewed the incident on Grayspur Ring and determined that the deployed Peacekeepers were not at fault. In fact, leaving the Mediator is probably what prevented the four of you from being knocked out along with the rest of the crew when Laughing Alice and her accomplices made their assay. You immediately returned and attempted to stop the theft. None of you, except perhaps Axiom, could’ve been expected to compete with Laughing Alice.”

“That’s not to say that this was the desired outcome.” Tenji adds. “We had been hoping for that artifact to give us an edge that we wouldn’t have otherwise. For now that is off the table, and though we’re looking at our options for getting it back, Alice is notoriously difficult to capture or pin down. As a former Challenger, she will know the value of a Dragine artifact, and do everything in her power to hang onto it. It’s very likely that we will never get that artifact back, despite our best attempts.”

“Which is why—” Nazka begins.

“Let’s… hold off on that for a bit, Nazka.” Tenji says quickly. “I think we need some time to regroup before we jump on upcoming projects.”

“Very well. As you’ll have it.” Nazka acquiesces.

“That is all we had to speak to you about.” Tenji goes on. “Whisper, Little Wolf, you are free to go now. Go get some rest; enjoy some downtime. I know the last few weeks have been stressful. Nazka, you are dismissed as well.”

“Understood.” he nods, turning and walking around the desk and heading for the door.

Whisper and Kwyn both give me looks, even as they start to stand up. “Go on, I’ll be fine.” I shrug to both of them. They both leave without a word, even though their expressions say enough. It’s not until I hear the office door spiral shut behind them that I return my attention to Tenji. “I guess I’m in a little bit of extra trouble?”

“Not quite.” Tenji says, rising from her chair and walking over to the glass wall behind her desk. “Come stand with me.”

I get up, walking tentatively around her desk to join her at the glass wall. She’s brushed many of the screens out of the way; some of them hold footage from the fight with Laughing Alice in the hangar of the Mediator. I avoid looking at them as Tenji clasps her wrists behind her back.

“I’m sorry that you ended up with this burden, Dare.” Tenji eventually says. “I know you didn’t ask for it. And now that I have it, I know we’re going to ask a lot of you. Even if this is technically what you signed up for, I know it’s a lot to deal with. I hope you don’t take offense at this, but I hadn’t expected you to end up with the Spark, and if I’d known that would’ve been the case, I would’ve thought twice about putting that burden on you.”

“It’s okay. I didn’t expect to end up with it either.” I say. “I’ll do the best I can with whatever it is. I still don’t really understand it.”

Tenji nods, staring out across the inner crescent of the HQ. “If it does become too much for you, you can hand it off to someone else. I am not going to ask you to carry more than what you can handle.”

I blink at that. “Hand it off?”

“Yes. From what the intelligence department can parse out of old Challenger records, Sparks didn’t have to be a lifetime appointment.” Tenji explains. “Over time, they would get passed down, like a mantle of responsibility, usually to a younger generation. Some people that received a Spark were just placeholders — they barely used it, and just held it until they could find someone else worthy to take it.”

“Oh. That’s…” I say, then pause. Unbidden, from the depths of my memory, I can hear the words that Nocturne spoke when she gave me the Spark on Chibundi.

Many will tell you how to use it, or ask you to use it on their behalf, or even to yield it to them. But in the end, only you, and the Spark itself, can decide when and how it will be wielded, and when to pass it on to another.

“If you do not feel you can handle it, you can hand it off to another.” Tenji says when I never pick up my abandoned sentence. “Or you can give it to me, and I will see to it that it makes it into the hands of someone that can fully harness its potential.”

I clear my throat a little. “Okay. I’ll… think about it, and let you know.” Even as I say it, I already know what my answer is. I’m only asking for time so I can give the illusion that I thought about it long and hard.

She nods, quiet for a moment more, then speaks again. “More and more recently, I’ve been thinking of a friend I used to have. Kwyn reminded me of him. And then you reminded me of him, again, today.”

“Really?” I ask, intrigued by this admission.

“Yes. A long time ago now. You and Kwyn both reminded me of him because you two are like him.” she says, staring at the star-speckled expanse out the window. “You two are modest, decent young people that are a little naïve, and just want to do the right thing. Specifically, both of you were reluctant to use your powers when you received them.”

I take a second to absorb that. “And your… friend — he had powers and was reluctant to use them?”

“He did, yes. And he was, yes.” she says softly. “He had incredible power, but he was afraid to use it. For whatever reason… he didn’t want to hurt people. And he just wanted to do the right thing. But he always hesitated, and he almost never tested the limits of his power. It ended up costing his friends, of which I was one.” She looks to me after moment. “There is a fine line between restraint and cowardice, Dare. As Nazka said, power comes with responsibility — but at the end of the day, it is meant to be used. We do not give people power so they can just sit on it — whether it’s physical, or magical, or political, or legal power, we expect it to be used. It’s the lesson Kwyn had to learn a year ago. It’s the same lesson I need you to learn now.”

“Understood, Administrator.” I nod. “No more holding back.”

“Good. That’s all I wanted to talk to you about.” she says, turning away from the glass wall. “I’ll let you go now. I’m sure you’d like to unwind since you just got back, and Whisper and Kwyn are probably waiting for you. Judging by the looks on their faces when they left, they were worried I was going to tear you a new one.”

“I mean. I was a little worried about that at first.” I say, walking back around her desk. “I’ll tell them it wasn’t as bad as they thought it would be.”

Tenji smiles. “You’re a lucky fellow, Dare. Rare is the man that has two women willing to share him.”

Those words twist me back around on the spot. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Nothing, just a joke. Go on, get along. I’m sure those two, and Kent, will be waiting for you at Gritter’s.” she says, making an amused shooing motion. “Drink a round or two for me. I can never show up anymore without making a stir.”

“Oh. Will do, then.” I say, turning back around and heading for the door. I spend a few seconds trying to parse Tenji’s comment, then decide to put it out of mind.

Just a joke, as she said.

Event Log: Darrow Bennion

CURSE HQ: Food Court

11/11/12764 12:20pm SGT

“C’mon, Dare, seriously? Spill the beans! The whole station is curious!”

I shake my head, using my fork to stir around the Brerwood salad I ordered. “We told you last night, Kent, we’re not ready to talk about it. When we’re ready to talk about it, or if the incident report is made public, you can read it then.”

“She musta shaken you all up something fierce.” Kent puffs, picking at one of his fries and nomping on it. “I never see you this tight-lipped about an assignment.”

I spear one of the blue tomato slices onto a couple lettuce leaves, stirring them around in the dressing. What I’m leaving unsaid is that for me, dealing with Laughing Alice wasn’t the most difficult part of that assignment. Having my Spark finally kick into gear, and having to explain that to other people when I didn’t even fully understand it, was the hard part. It wasn’t something I was ready to talk about yet, in large part because I knew I was going to get asked questions I didn’t have the answer to.

“How ‘bout this: you tell me about what’s been going on around here.” I say as I munch on my salad. “I saw that Prophet’s finally back; he’s been gone for months. What’s the story on that?”

Kent snorts. “What, you haven’t seen the commercials? Your pious buddy is one of the faces of the Confederacy’s recruitment drives. Ever since the COS took a black eye from the Mokasha invasion, he’s been out there pounding the pavement, drumming up support for the COS military and giving big rousing speeches at SCORN conventions and recruitment drives. Whippin’ up national pride and xenophobia to get the yokels to sign their lives away in the name of the flag. I think they’ve been deploying him to farm worlds and other places where he’ll get a warm welcome from religious communities.”

“Really? I knew he was big in the Anayan Church, but I didn’t know he worked for the COS government as well.” I say, combining another tomato slice with a cucumber and a shredded bell pepper.

“Well, if he didn’t before, he does now.” Kent says, picking up his burger. “Losing Mokasha gave the Confederacy a kick in the pants. They’re tightening up their military, and tapping public figures to consolidate popular and cultural support. I don’t know what all Prophet’s been doing in the last six months, but it’s more than just giving stump speeches to get the patriots jazzed. The Confederacy has him working on something; I can smell it.”

“You sure that’s not your prejudice speaking?” I ask as Kent takes a bite of his burger. “Last I remember, you had a bone to pick with him due to his personal beliefs.”

Kent holds up a finger, asking me to wait while he finishes chewing. “I got a bone to pick with anyone that tells me I can’t touch fluffy tail because I’m human.” he says, wiping the corner of his mouth with the corner of his grease-stained shirt. “Don’t get me wrong, people got rights to worship how they want, even if it is fumruckin’ weird. But the moment somebody tries to shove their religion into my bedroom, we’re gonna have problems. I don’t care what god you worship — who I rub crotches with is none of their business.”

I quirk my mouth, stabbing my fork into my salad for a bit. “That’s, uhm… that’s definitely one way to phrase it. But yeah, I get your point, and I agree. However, counterpoint: would you rather deal with Prophet, or the Collective?”

Kent lets out an aggravated groan. “This again. Haven’t we already had this debate already? Except instead of the Collective, it was the Valiant. No matter what you do, you can always find a greater evil that makes Prophet look like the lesser evil when you sit them next to each other. But that doesn’t make Prophet good. It just makes him less evil. Less evil is still evil.”

“I mean, I wouldn’t really call him evil…” I say reluctantly.

“Have you not seen some of his speeches? Because I have!” Kent says incredulously. “The dude is demagogue! He’s a religious bigot that spreads hate and xenophobia! Like yeah, I get it, the Collective sucks, and I wouldn’t trust a Maskling further than I could throw them, but Prophet takes it to a whole new level. The dude literally advocates for genocide, and that stems from the fact that the Collective and Masklings can be racial hybrids and chimaeras. From the bedroom to the battlefield, this dude is off his nut. We should not be working with him.”

I shrug. “I’m gonna level with you, Kent: as far as I’m concerned, he’s another body to put between us and Songbird. I get where you’re coming from, and I don’t like his beliefs either. But when it comes down to it — when you’re out there in the field, putting your life on the line — you don’t have the luxury of picking and choosing your allies. And when you’re in battle, you don’t care about the other guy’s politics — you just want to know that he has your back when the shooting starts.”

“Yeah, but didn’t he get his ass beat at the Cradle just like the rest of you?” Kent points out.

“He did, yes.” I mutter, getting a forkful of salad. “Everyone got a categorical assbeating during the Cradle assignment. Even Nazka.”

“And would anything had been different if he wasn’t there?” Kent asks.

“Okay, so in fairness to everyone involved—”

“So the answer is no, nothing would’ve been different.” Kent interjects. “And if Prophet can’t change the outcome of a fight against Songbird, then why do we even have him around in the first place?”

“I mean, the Valiant’s more than just Songbird. There are other people that Prophet can clobber if you give him the chance.” I point out. “He’s a heavy hitter when he’s facing off against anyone other than Songbird.”

Kent points one of his fries at me. “You’re just makin’ excuses at this point, Dare. Mark my words, we’re going to regret working with this dude one of these days.”

“They’ve been saying the same thing about Onslaught for years, and yet she’s still here.” I point out. “Even if I’d rather her not be.”

“Onslaught’s different.” Kent says, popping the fry in his mouth. “She’s cute.”

I give him a flat look. “She’s unhinged.”

“C’mon, Dare. You don’t expect me to believe that you’ve never looked at the crazy blonde and thought to yourself I’d tap that?”

“Maybe I did, before I realized how unhinged she was. There’s a reason they tell you not to stick your dick in crazy, Kent.”

“Oh, like you’re one to talk. It’s been years since you stuck your dick in anything.”

I choke on my salad, bracing a forearm on the table as I hammer my chest with my other hand. “Gatdamn, Kent. Ease up, you’re killin’ me here.”

Kent shrugs, taking another bite of his burger. “I don’t see you denying it.”

I cough a couple more times, grabbing my napkin and wiping my mouth. “Look, it ain’t easy being a Peacekeeper. I’ve got more responsibilities than the rank and file do, and the job comes with a lot more stress. It’s not just hard for me to handle that; it’s hard to handle for the people around me as well. And it’s hard on relationships too.”

“Yeah, yeah, the whole Roya thing. Even though you two were never a thing.” Kent says, waving that off. “You know, there’s this remarkable new invention; it’s call a one-night stand. Could I perhaps interest you in trying one?”

“I’ve never understood people that could do those.” I say, grabbing my drink and taking a sip. “I’m not trying to throw shade or anything, I just— I don’t know. I just can’t get my head around the idea of having sex with someone I barely know.”

Kent smirks at that. “Why don’t you go ask Whisper? She’s an expert on the topic. I’m sure she’d be happy to walk you through it. Maybe even give you a demonstration.”

I glare at him. “Ha ha, you’re very funny.”

He shrugs, popping the last of his burger in his mouth. “All I’m sayin’ is that Whisper would be happy to show you the ropes of a one-night stand. If I was in your position, I’d sign up for that class in a heartbeat and so would a whole lotta other people.”

“We’re friends, Kent. Coworkers. And she was the one that trained me.” I say, picking up my fork again. “Even assuming I was considering it, shit would be real awkward after that.”

“It’s only awkward if you make it awkward. But hey, you wanna keep livin’ in denial, be my guest.” Kent says, picking up his fry basket and shaking it. “Anyhow, I’m about done. You want the rest of my fries, big guy?”

“Mmm… yeah, why not. This salad tastes great, but it’s light on the protein and filling stuff. I think next time I’ll order the wood elf version.”

“Oh, is the wood elf version supposed to be meatier?”

“Yeah, your choice of shredded chicken or hardboiled egg to go on top.”

“Nice. Remind me to order that next time we swing by here.”

Event Log: Darrow Bennion

CURSE HQ: Intelligence and Security Analytics Department

11/12/12764 11:40am SGT

“And this is all we’ve got on him?” I say, glancing at the download on my data slate. The file size is tiny compared to most briefings we usually receive.

“That is everything we have managed to accrue so far.” SCION replies without looking up from the holodesk he’s at. “His presence is surprisingly scant, even among his native population. This appears to be the primary impediment to finding out more about him; even his own people don’t know much about him.”

“Seriously? The way he was talking on Keinoct, it sounded like he was on the ideological fringe of Maskling society.” I say, tucking the slate under my arm. “I figured there’d be more about him.”

“Not all radicals operate loudly. Some take a quieter approach.” SCION answers. “But you will discover what you need to know when you peruse that file. There is no point in composing that file for you if you expect me to tell you everything you were wanting to know.”

“Right. Of course. Thank you for putting this together.” I say, backing towards the door. “You have a good day, SCION.”

“And you too, Axiom.”

The door to the room slides shut behind me and locks once I step into the hall. Pulling the slate out from under my arm, I unlock the screen and then open the research file on Makalu, starting to skim through it. There’s not a lot of material, and most of the cited sources are from centuries ago — implying that mountain man hobo that clobbered me and Ironfist has been around for a while.

“Any other secrets that you’re keeping from me?”

“Khaa!” I fumble my slate as I turn the corner in the hall to find Kwyn in my way, leaning against the wall with her arms folded. “Ah! Jeez! You startled me, Kwyn. What are you doing here— wait, what do you mean by secrets?”

I can tell by the set of her brows that she’s not happy. “Don’t play dumb with me, Dare. You know what I’m talking about.”

This is abnormally aggressive for Kwyn, and I take a deep breath. “Look, if this is about the Spark, I didn’t— it’s… it’s complicated, okay? I didn’t mean anything by it, seriously, it was just…”

“That you trusted Whisper enough to tell her about it, but not me?” she scowls, pushing off the wall.

“No! No, it’s not like that!” I say quickly. “It’s just…”

“Just what?” she demands. “Because with that look you and Whisper gave me in the Administrator’s office, seems an awful lot like you two want me to stay out of your business.”

“What? No, nonononono!” I say rapidly, holding my hands up. “That wasn’t it at all! We didn’t want you to get in trouble and take the heat for something you weren’t involved in!”

“I’d rather be involved in it and get in trouble than feel left out by the people I thought were my friends!” she snaps.

That shocks me silent. My mind goes blank; I don’t know what to say, and it feels like the circuits in my brain have shorted out.

Kwyn grits her teeth. “I shouldn’t have said that.” she mumbles, starting to turn away.

I act without thinking, moving forward and snagging her arm. “Kwyn, hold up. I don’t… I didn’t… okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way. I didn’t want to hurt you.”

She looks at me, then, at the hand I’ve got snagged in her jacket sleeve, then looks down. “I… sorry. That came out of me stronger than I thought it would. Ever since Alice went digging around in my head, I’ve felt a little unstable, and my emotions are really swingy. Sorry. Don’t worry about—”

“I didn’t want to disappoint you.” I blurt out. Kwyn stops and looks at me; realizing I’m still holding her jacket, I let go. “Sorry, I just… I didn’t want to disappoint everybody. I couldn’t control the Spark, didn’t even know how to use it, and I didn’t want to disappoint everybody, especially after how we got rolled at the Cradle. But I didn’t want to disappoint you, because…” I hesitate, fighting with whether or not I should say it. “…how you view me is important. To me. And I didn’t want to disappoint you. Or let you down.” The words have slowly gotten quieter, turning into a mumble by the end as I avoid looking at her.

“Why did you tell Whisper, then?” Kwyn asks, her tawny eyes searching me. The anger that was in her voice has softened considerably. “Do you not care how she looks at you?”

“No, it’s not that; it’s just…” I reach up, rubbing the back of my neck, and figure that I’m already this far in, so I might as well just have out with it. “…Whisper, she… already knows me. She’s seen me at my best, she’s seen me at my worst, watched me bawl my eyes out over stupid shit, and… yeah. She doesn’t the judge me the way…” I hesitate when I realize where my word vomit is leading me.

“She wouldn’t judge you the way you think I would.” Kwyn finishes softly.

“Well, yeah, but like, not in a bad way?” I say, trying to salvage it. “Like—”

“Dare, it’s okay. I get it.” she says. “But I wouldn’t have thought less of you for it. Like Whisper said in Tenji’s office — you have no experience with these things, no powers, no magic. It’s not your fault you wouldn’t have known how to use it.”

I bite my lip. “That’s not what Tenji and the other Peacekeepers would think.”

“Tenji and the other Peacekeepers don’t have to carry the Spark.” Kwyn says. “But also, Dare — if you care what I think about you, don’t keep secrets from me.”

I give her a pained look. “Kwyn, that’s not fair. You know how I… you know.”

She jams her hands into the pockets of her jacket, looking down. “I know, I just… I don’t like being left out. Being excluded. It’s why I usually keep to myself. My friends always abandon me, and I don’t… want it to happen again.”

I don’t know what to say to that, although it does help explain a lot about why Kwyn’s so rarely social with other people, in addition to her other issues. You can’t be abandoned if there’s no one to abandon you. “I wouldn’t abandon you, Kwyn. You know that.”

“Yeah. I know, I just… I don’t like being left out. It hurts a lot.” she says, still looking down. It seems like much of her aggression has fizzled by now. “I envy what you and Whisper have. I wish I could be that close with someone.”

That’s also something I don’t know how to reply to. “Well,” I say after a moment. “next time one of my friendships crumbles and I’m having an emotional breakdown, you can keep me company while I’m bawling my eyes out. How’s that sound?”

Her mouth twitches at the corners. I know she’s not in the mood for jokes and laughing, but I can tell she wanted to, for a brief second. “Okay.” she says quietly, fidgeting a little. “The other reason I came to find you was, uh… we need to plan training.”

“Oh yeah. That’s… we’re supposed to be doing that, right.” The rest of that conversation in Tenji’s office is coming back. I start walking down the hall again, Kwyn turning and starting to walk beside me. “So what kind of training is this going to be…?”

“Uh, well… how do you feel about sharing your dreams with me?”

“Oh. Well, my dreams are usually weird and don’t make sense, and I hardly remember them most times. Am I going to need a dream journal for this?”

“That’s not quite how I meant it. What I mean is I would be literally walking around inside your dreams while we’re sleeping.”

“Oh.”

“So are you okay with that?”

“Well…”

Event Log: Darrow Bennion

CURSE HQ: Axiom’s Quarters

11/13/12764 11:24pm SGT

“…so apparently she’s going to be taking regular strolls through my dreams.”

“Well that’s…” Whisper begins, then pauses, as if thinking carefully about what she was about to say. “…interesting. Just whenever she wants, or is there going to be a schedule to it?”

“Oh, it’ll be scheduled. We’re going to be using one of the sleep study rooms in the research department. The ones with the windows and the cameras, so it’s not like we’re going to be sleeping in each other’s personal quarters or anything.” I say, remaining still as Whisper continues daubing gel across the healing slash on my back. Laughing Alice had nailed me good with her psiblade during our fight on Grayspur, and they ended up doing emergency work on me at one of Grayspur’s hospitals. The hospital probably would’ve kept me for longer, but CURSE ordered my discharge so that we could return back to the HQ, and the Mediator’s infirmary staff had done my daily checkups and treatment the whole way back, with a proper doctor’s appointment scheduled for me the moment I got back to the HQ.

“So both of you are supposed to be sleeping at the same time?” Whisper asks, dipping her fingers back in the medical gel container. She’s kneeling on the bed behind me, while I’m sitting on its edge, forearms braced on my knees.

“Yeah. She says she can’t dreamwalk while she’s awake; apparently her bloodline is too diluted for that. And apparently she needs physical contact with the person she’s dreamwalking with. Holding their hand or hugging their arm or something.” I explain.

“Oh ho, handholding? How sinful.” Whisper teases, her fingers painting more of the gel along the slash crossing my back. “This all just sounds like a really convoluted excuse to sleep next to someone you like.”

“Well, if that’s her plan, I’m pretty sure she’d be runnin’ it on her mystery crush and not me.” I say, lacing my fingers together and twiddling my thumbs. “The whole point of the dreamwalk sessions is to figure out where the Spark is hidden in my psyche, I guess, and establish regular communication with it. And hopefully, being able to find and talk with it on my own will allow me to better understand how it works, and how to harness it. Kwyn said her job is just to teach me how to find it, and make first contact. After that, the rest is up to me.”

“So how long is this training supposed to last?” Whisper asks. “Seems like it’ll be over the moment you’re able to find the Spark on your own within your psyche.”

“Not sure. We haven’t started yet, and Kwyn says it might take several sessions to figure out where the Spark’s tucked away inside my head.” I reply as she starts daubing the ends of the gash on my back. “Could be a week, could be more. Might even get it on the first session, but we just don’t know for sure, and we won’t know until we start.”

“Well, if nothing else, you’ll get to spend some quality time with her, even if it is technically for work-related stuff.” Whisper remarks. “Let’s just hope your subconscious behaves and doesn’t reveal anything embarrassing while she’s going for a stroll through your dreams.”

“Ugh. Don’t remind me. My brain cranks out some messed-up stuff sometimes.” I grumble. “How much you wanna bet she stumbles across something weird in there and she never looks at me the same way again?”

“You? Weird? Perish the thought.” Whisper scoffs, taking a long, reusable bandage and starting to press it over the gash on my back, starting at the bottom of the gash and slowly making her way up, ensuring the adhesive is sticking to my skin. “You’re as vanilla as they come. Buttoned up and clean, the straight man to Kent’s horndog.”

“That’s just what I show to everyone else. People are more what they hide than what they reveal to others.” I say, fighting the urge to move as Whisper works along the length of the bandage, sealing it into place. “We go to lengths to suppress the strange stuff about ourselves, to look normal, so we can fit in with other people.”

“Oh? Are you hiding things from me, Dare?” Whisper teases as she finishes pressing the top end of the bandage over my gash. “Keeping some kinks hidden under that normal, well-adjusted exterior?”

I snort. “Like I’d tell you, you little gremlin. I know better than to give you ammunition.”

“C’mon, it’s not like I’d share it with anyone. I’m bad, but I’m not that bad.”

“No, you’d just tease me about it every chance you get.”

She wraps her arms around me from behind, resting her head on my shoulder. “I tease you because you’re my friend. I want to see you have fun. Explore more of yourself.”

“Explore more of myself, eh?” I say, turning my head in her direction ever so slightly. I can’t see her behind me, but at least she can tell I’m speaking to her. “Watch me grow as a person and all that?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, you’re not the only one.” I return my gaze to the sliding glass door that leads out to my balcony. The curve of the planet we’re orbiting takes up part of the view beyond the balcony railing. “Mum and Dad sent me a care package. Dad was wondering if I was ever going to find a girl, get married, and have kids.”

“Oh?” Whisper says, lifting her head off my shoulder. “What’d you tell him?”

“I deflected. Told him work’s been busy and it’s hard to keep a stable relationship when you have to pingpong around the galaxy for most of the year.”

“I mean, that’s not deflection because it’s pretty much the truth, isn’t it?” Whisper points out. “We’ve talked about this before. Relationships are different for Peacekeepers just because of how the work is. It’s why most of us do flings, or date within our peer group. Trying to make it work outside of those two options is really hard.”

“I mean yeah, I suppose.” I concede.

“But it still bothers you?” Whisper guesses, letting go of me and moving to sit beside me on the bed.

“Yeah.” I say, scratching idly at my cheek. “Not the relationships thing, but the thing about marriage and kids. Most of the time I just keep it shoved to the back of my head, and I don’t think about it. But when my parents bring it up, it just wedges right there at the front of my head and doesn’t go away. It’s different from when it comes up on its own; when my parents bring it up—”

“It comes with all the baggage of expectations and implied disappointment about not having grandchildren and building a stable home and a family and all that.” Whisper says. “Yeah, I know the feeling. You feel guilty. Your self-esteem takes a hit, and you start questioning what you’re doing with your life, and whether what you’re doing is really what you want to be doing. Wouldn’t happen when a friend or acquaintance asks you the same question, but when it’s family asking, somehow it just hits different.”

I glance aside at her. “Six hundred years of experience really comes in handy for these conversations, doesn’t it.”

She smiles at that. “A lot of ‘been there, done that’. At this point my family knows I’m not going to settling down and having kids anytime soon. But I still remember what it felt like whenever they’d ask me about it.”

I glance back to the view through the glass door. “I just don’t know what to tell my parents. I don’t want to let them down. They don’t ask about it a lot, but every time they ask about it, I just deflect, make it seem like it’ll happen eventually, just not right now. But I’m not actually sure it’ll ever happen, and I’m not sure how to tell them that.”

“I’d say just give it to them straight, but you’ve got a better relationship with your family than I do with mine.” Whisper says. “I’ll just say that you don’t need kids or a spouse to live a happy or meaningful life. There’s a lot of people that never get married, and never have kids, but they still manage to be successful, happy, and have meaningful relationships with other people. That can be you, if you want it to be. Being single and childless is not a failure; it’s a choice, and it’s one you’re allowed to make.”

“Thanks. I appreciate that; it helps to hear someone else say it.” I say, rubbing a thumb over one of my palms. “You don’t see that message a lot in pop media. It’s just romances, drama, fairytale endings.”

“True. Singles positivity is underrepresented.” Whisper says, then leans to the side, bumping her shoulder against mine with a sly grin. “That being said, having a cute girl take a stroll in your dreams seems like it might be a good way to get to know her a little better…”

“Yeah, about that… she’s a little mad at us.”

“Wait, what? Seriously? Kwyn, mad? Why?”

“She feels like we were keeping secrets from her, since I told you about the Spark, but not her.”

“Really? Huh. I wouldn’t have figured.”

“Yeah. She doesn’t like being excluded or being left out by her friends, and that’s what we did to her, evidently.”

“I mean… yeah, technically, that’s exactly what we did. We excluded her.”

“But… it was my problem, right? I get to decide who I confide in about it, right?”

“I mean, yeah, there’s that, but did you not want to confide in her about it? I thought you really liked her, and seems like sharing your problems with her is a way to get closer to her, right?”

“Well… yeah, I just… I dunno. Maybe I’m dense. It seems like she’s really fixed on her mystery crush, and yet she wants me to open up to her and confide my problems to her? And now, with this training, she’s basically going to be walking around in my head… it’s just…”

“Mixed signals?”

“Yeah. Seems like she wants it both ways. Wants her crush, but also wants me to open up to her, but without being in a relationship with her, and I… just… not sure what to do with that.”

“Maybe she’s just a little shaken up after dealing with Laughing Alice. Giv’er some time, and if she’s still sending mixed signals a week from now, let me know and I can go straighten her out.”

“Don’t need to take it that far. Just figured I’d let you know so we can maybe include her a little more. I think when we gave her that look in Tenji’s office, she felt like we were conspiring against her.”

“What? No! She’s our cute little Junior. We were just trying to protect her!”

“You and I know that, but that’s not how it came across to her.”

“Well, next chance I get, I’ll go hug some sense into her. In the meantime, you want to play a few rounds of Rant Legends?”

“Seriously? It’s almost midnight!”

“Please? Just a couple rounds, it’ll help you unwind!”

“You say that, and then we’re gonna get a bad round, and you’ll want to go another round to end on a good note, and then all the sudden it’s three in the morning and you’re seething after a series of lost matches.”

“We’ll call it after the first win we get, promise. If we win the first game, that’s it, we’re done for the night!”

“If I listen to you, I’m gonna be awake for the next four hours.”

“So… yes?”

“Let me get the controllers.”

“Yesssss!”

Intercepted Audio

CURSE HQ: Administrator’s Office

Accessed through room systems

Gossamer: You can’t send them there.

Tenji: I’m aware of the rumors.

G: Those aren’t rumors, Tenji.

T: Are you volunteering, then?

G: What? No. Like, I am saying this in the broadest sense, not just for the Peacekeepers, but the whole operative corps: you can’t send anyone there. You do not understand the risks on that planet. There is a reason the Colloquium designated it as a restricted world.

T: There’s a Dragine artifact there, Gossamer. After the fiasco with Laughing Alice, we need this. We’ve been underperforming on many of our recent critical missions, and we need something to keep us ahead of the Valiant.

G: Y’know what, fine — you got a point there. But the way to do it is not chasing rumors about a Dragine artifact, especially not on that world. You’re sure there’s an artifact there?

T: SCION said confidence was very high, and that this artifact might be related to the one that Laughing Alice stole.

G: Gods, I don’t even… look, if you don’t believe me, talk to Nazka. We cannot send our people to that planet, even if there is an artifact there.

T: We won’t send rank-and-file. We’ll be sending a hand-picked Peacekeeper team that will have a skillset tailored to the assignment’s needs. It’ll be small, discreet, but we’ll make sure we’ve got a couple of heavy hitters in there.

G: You are not listening to me, Tenji. This is not a matter of who you send. It’s not a matter of how many. It’s not a matter of how powerful they are. That planet, that world, is a place that does not care who you throw at it. It will either consume or corrupt anyone that tries to steal from it without permission. Hell, you don’t even have to steal from it! Just setting foot on the planet makes you fair game. The Ranters only get away with it because the planet belongs to them, and even then they’ll admit that they lose people to it. If you send people there, some of them are not going to come back. Those that do are probably going to be majorly screwed up. And that’s not even a guarantee that we’ll get the artifact.

T: We don’t have a choice, Gossamer.

G: [sighing]

T: I know you don’t like it. I don’t like making decisions about acceptable losses either, but this is one of those cases—

G: It’s not about the losses, ‘Ji. I get that. I know that. I know it better than you. That’s the industry we work in. People get hurt, people get killed, and we have to make sure that if people are going to die, we’re at least accomplishing something while we’re at it. But this isn’t that. That place will not kill people, not right away. It keeps them, if it can capture them. And what it does to them while they’re there…

T: That’s a risk we have to take.

G: You only say that because you don’t truly comprehend the kind of risk you are exposing them to.

T: Gossamer.

G: I understand that you have to do what you have to do for the good of the whole organization, Tenji. I know. Just… understand that Avvikerene is not a place I would wish upon my enemies. And certainly not upon my coworkers, even the most aggravating ones. Do what you have to, but understand that I’m not going to agree with you on this, no matter how badly we need this artifact.

T: You really think it’s that bad?

G: You don’t know Avvikerene like some of us do. I pray to Belanus and Alt that you never have to. No one comes back from that planet the same, assuming they even come back at all.

T: …understood. I’ll bear that in mind while making the personnel decisions for the assignment. Beyond that, have you met with Nazka yet?

G: Yes, I’ve brought him up to speed on what the Daughters of Azra expect in return for the artifact tipoff. Unpalatable as they are, I have to admit that what they’re asking in in return is… really not much.

T: You don’t like them either? I know they’re a criminal group, but…

G: You really don’t know much about the Rantecevang Diaspora, do you? The Daughters of Azra aren’t just a crime syndicate; they’re a cult that worships a demon goddess.

T: Oh. Charming. Is it at least an interesting cult, or is it just more of the same?

G: A little bit of both. They want to unleash their demon goddess on the galaxy so she can rule over it with an iron fist, but they need a ninetailed morphox to serve as her vessel in the mortal plane since that’s a condition of the enchantment that keeps her locked in hell, and… well, it’s like most religious things. The further you go down the hole, the weirder it gets.

T: Ah. Great. As if Prophet and his Anayan inquisition wasn’t enough. Genocidal altar boys on one side, authoritarian cultists on the other… why don’t we ever partner with scientists or philosophers? Reasonable people.

G: Reasonable people are less prone to violence and political machinations.

T: Mmm… yes, that tracks. At any rate, will continuing to be the liaison for the Daughters of Azra be a problem for you?

G: No, I can handle it. I don’t like them, but I’m used to putting on my business face for these kinds of interactions. From what I’ve been told, they were the group that sourced the information about where the Bulwark would be at the start of the year.

T: That information went through a middleman before. I suppose cutting out the middleman gets us faster results, though removing that extra layer makes me a little uncomfortable. Plausible deniability is harder to claim when there’s no insulating layer between their organization and ours.

G: It’ll only be a problem if people found out we’re working with them, and I have no intention of letting that happen. Trust me, no one will be able to trace back our involvement with them.

T: Mmm. I trust you with it. Is there anything else? I need to hop on a call with the head of the Vaunted.

G: I’ll leave you to it. I never liked the politics.

T: Neither did I, but that’s the price we pay for this kind of power.